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I HAVE A BOOK 200 YRS OLD OF THESE LIMERICKS
I WILL KEEP THEM AS TAME AS POSSIBLE !! :208- :208- :208- :208-
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THERE WAS A YOUNG FELLOW NAMED CHARTED !
WHO RUBBED SOAP ON HIS "BUNG" WHEN IT SMARTED ,
AND TO HIS SURPRISE
HE RECEIVED THE GRAND PRIZE,
FOR THE BUBBLES HE BLEW WHEN HE FARTED !!  

another great find on books !! the greatest LIMERICK BOOK OF ALL TIMES !!
OVER 1700 LIMERICS OBTAINED FROM SEA CAPTAINS LOG BOOKS DATING BACK CENTURIES !!

you can only imagine sitting around with a group of  12 or so--guys -just  reading these off .. will bring laughter to all on the worst day going
mix a little alcohol  into the readings ?? you have the stomach that will hurt for 3 days from laughing so hard ..

as CAPTAIN HAPPY --must of listened to on his Submarine runs--many LIMERICS  to keep moral up !! this book was the bible !!lol

JUST THE THOUGHT OF THE TWISTED MINDS THAT WROTE THIS STUFF  :72- :72- :72- :72-
YOU KNEW THEY HAD BEEN AWAY FROM PORT FOR MONTHS   :72- :72- :72- :72- :72- :72- :72- :72- :72-

okay, this is not a limerick but more of a company slogan...
Let me fill in the background.
I knew this playboy-type of sailor that was always on the prowl at the local seaside bars.
He wasn't a bad looking guy but he had a great sense of humor.

His job during the day was drilling water wells for residences and businesses.
He came up with the perfect slogan for his business.

On the front of his cap was a printed picture of a drilling rig
with the inscription underneath it that clearly read>>>









                                            






                                             "Your Hole Is Our Goal"

my buddy has a sewer sucker truck about 5000 gallon tank .
his name is  KENNY R. ANDERSON

ON HIS TRUCK ON THE BACK IT SAYS KRAP. CO. INC.

WE DO OUR JOB RIGHT OR DOUBLE YOUR KRAP. BACK.  :97- :97- :97- :97-

OH BOY WE ARE GOING IN !!! :5- :5- :5- :5- :5-

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 :59- :59- :59- :59- YOU GET TWO TODAY  :59- :59- :59- :59-

A WORRIED YOUNG MAN FROM STAMBOUL
DISCOVERED RED SPOTS ON HIS TOOL ! :37- :37- :37- :37- :37- :37-
SAID THE DOCTOR IN "CYNIC" ,
"GET OUT OF MY CLINIC !
JUST WIPE OFF THE "LIPSTICK YOU FOOL "

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THERE IS A YOUNG GIRL FROM NEW YORK  :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97-
WHO IS CAUTIOS FROM FEAR OF THE STORK .
YOU WILL FIND SHE IS TAPED
TO PREVENT BENG RAPED
AND HER  @SSHOLE IS PLUGGED WITH A CORK !

I moved this topic to the rants and raves section as it could be considered offensive to some. Please try to keep it clean. :71- :210- :208- :208-


StatFreak :31-
:nlg-  Global Moderator

BUZZY HELD A GUN TO MY HEAD --THEY WILL BE TAIMED DOWN !!! :72- :72- :72- :72- :72-

I think the "rants and raves" section is adult oriented...lol
Doesn't work for me though...I'm still a kid... :72- :200-
I'm fairly certain the age of my mentality is questioned everyday... :5-

its questioned nightly as well Bunker lol had to say it !!!
I myself will never grow up --I dont want to lol
the riddle  capt happy is going to love ths one !!!

 :138- :138- :138- :138- :138- :138- :138- :138-
I have to leave !! fast !!! Buzzy is driving down my driveway waving a pistol out the window of his truck  !!
yelling post that limerick -Rocket

he made me do it at  gun point the other day !!

just a quiet one for friday !!

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said a madam named Mamie La FARGE
to  a sailor just off a barge ,
we have one girl that is dead ,
with a hole in her center of  head ----
of course there's a slight extra charge "