New Life Games Tech Forums

EDITORIAL NOTE: EXTREMELY FUNNY, BUT GRAPHICAL LANGUAGE... RE READY TO MUTE, NOT FOR KIDS EVEN THOUGH THE COW LOOKS CUTE!!! HAVE A GREAT LAUGH! THANKS JOEY! CH  :95-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y2hih3imPH8 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y2hih3imPH8)
 :5-

BOUNCE... the stuff you use in your dryer:

Repels mosquitoes. Tie a sheet of Bounce through a belt loop when outdoors during mosquito season. Eliminates static electricity from your television screen. Since Bounce is designed to help eliminate static cling, wipe your TV screen with a used sheet of Bounce to keep dust from resettling. Dissolves soap scum from shower doors. Clean with a used sheet of Bounce. Freshens the air in your home. Place an individual sheet of Bounce in a drawer or hang one in a closet.

Prevents thread from tangling. Run a threaded needle through a sheet of Bounce to eliminate the static cling on the thread before sewing. Eliminates static cling from pantyhose. Rub a damp, used sheet of Bounce over the hose. Prevents musty suitcases. Place an individual sheet of Bounce inside empty luggage before storing. Freshens the air in your car. Place a sheet of Bounce under the front seat. Cleans baked-on food from a cooking pan. Put a sheet in the pan, fill with water, let sit overnight, sponge clean. The anti-static agents apparently weaken the bond between food and the pan while the fabric softening agents soften the baked-on food. Place a sheet of Bounce at the bottom of the wastebasket. Collects cat hair. Rubbing the area with a sheet of Bounce will magnetically attract all the loose hairs. Wipe the blinds with a sheet of Bounce to prevent dust from resettling. Wipes up sawdust from drilling or sand papering. A used sheet of Bounce will collect sawdust like a tack cloth. Eliminates odors in dirty laundry. Place an individual sheet of Bounce at the bottom of a laundry bag or hamper. Deodorizes shoes or sneakers. Place a sheet of Bounce in your shoes or sneakers overnight so they'll smell great in the morning.

COCA COLA

To clean a toilet: Pour a can of Coca-Cola into the toilet bowl. Let the "real thing" sit for one hour, then flush clean. The citric acid in Coke removes stains from vitreous china. To remove rust spots from chrome car bumpers: Rub the bumper with a crumpled-up piece of Reynolds Wrap aluminum foil dipped in Coca Cola. To clean corrosion from car battery terminals: Pour a can of Coca-Cola over the terminals to bubble away the corrosion. To loosen a rusted bolt: Apply a cloth soaked in Coca-Cola to the rusted bolt for a few minutes. To bake a moist ham: Empty a can of Coca-Cola into the baking pan; wrap the ham in aluminum foil, and bake. Thirty minutes before the ham is finished, remove the foil, allowing the drippings to mix with the Coke for a sumptuous gravy. To remove grease from clothes: Empty a can of Coke into a load ofgreasy clothes, add detergent, and run through a regular cycle. The Coca-Cola will help loosen the stain. It will also clean road haze from your windshield.

AND..... WE DRINK THIS STUFF?????

You Know You Grew Up In The 80's If...

1. You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE".

2. You watched the Pound Puppies.

3. You can sing the rap to the "Fresh Prince of Belair " ...and can do the "Carlton".

4. Girls wore biker shorts under their skirts and felt stylishly sexy.

5. You yearned to be a member of the Baby-sitters club and tried to start a club of your own.

6. You owned those lil' Strawberry Shortcake pals scented dolls.

7. "WOAH " comes from Joey on Blossom.

8. Two words: Hammer Pants.

9. If you ever watched "Fraggle Rock ".

10. You had plastic streamers on your handle bars... and "spokey-dokes" or playing cards on your spokes for that incredible sound effect.

11. You can sing the entire theme song to "Duck Tales ". (Woo ooh!)

12. You wore a ponytail on the side of your head.

13. When it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons.

14. You saw the original "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles " on the big screen... and still know the turtles names.

15. You got super-excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school.

16. You made your mom buy one of those clips that would hold your shirt in a knot on the side.

17. You played the game "MASH ". (Mansion, Apartment, Shelter, House)

18. You wore stonewashed Jordache jean jackets and were proud of it.

19. L.A. Gear... need I say more.

20. You wanted to change your name to "JEM " in Kindergarten. (She's truly outrageous)

21. You remember reading "Tales of a fourth grade nothing " and all the Ramona books.

22. You know the profound meaning of "WAX ON, WAX OFF".

23. You wanted to be a Goonie.

24. You ever wore fluorescent clothing. (some of us... head-to-toe)

25. You can remember what Michael Jackson looked like before his nose fell off and his cheeks shifted.

26. You have ever pondered why Smurfette was the only female smurf.

27. You took lunch boxes to school... and traded Garbage Pail Kids in the schoolyard.

28. You remember the CRAZE, then the BANNING of slap bracelets.

29. You still get the urge to say "NOT " after every sentence.

30. You remember Hypercolor t-shirts.

31. Barbie and the Rockers was your favorite band.

32. You thought She-ra (Princess of Power!) and He-Man should hookup.

33. You thought your childhood friends would never leave because you exchanged handmade friendship bracelets.

34. You ever owned a pair of Jelly-Shoes. (and like #24, probably in neon colors, too)

35. After you saw Pee-Wee's Big Adventure you kept saying "I know you are, but what am I?"

36. You remember "I've fallen and I can't get up"

37. You remember going to the skating rink before there were inline skates.

38. You ever got seriously injured on a Slip and Slide.

39. You have ever played with a Skip-It.

40. You had or attended a birthday party at McDonalds.

41. You've gone through this nodding your head in agreement.

42. You remember Popples.

43. "Don't worry, be happy"

44. You wore like, EIGHT pairs of socks over tights with high top Reeboks.

45. You wore socks scrunched down (and sometimes still do...getting yelled at by "younger hip" members of the family)

46. "Miss MARY MACK MACK MACK, all dressed in BLACK BLACK BLACK "

47. You remember boom boxes. and walking around with one on your shoulder like you were all that.

48. You remember watching both "Gremlins" movies.

49. You know what it meant to say "Care Bear Stare!"

50. You remember watching "Rainbow Bright" and "My Little Pony Tales "

51. You thought Doogie Howser/Samantha Micelli was hot.

52. You remember Alf, the lil furry brown alien from Melmac.

53. You remember New Kids on the Block when they were cool... and don't even flinch when people refer to them as "NKOTB".

54. You knew all the characters names and their life stories on "Saved By the Bell ", the ORIGINAL class.

55. You know all the words to Bon Jovi - SHOT THROUGH THE HEART.

56. You just sang those words to yourself.

57.You remember watching Magic vs. Bird.

58. Homemade Levi shorts. (the shorter the better)

59. You remember when mullets were cool!

60. You had a mullet!

61. You still sing "We are the World"

62. You tight rolled your jeans.

63. You owned a bannana clip.

64. You remember "Where's the Beef?"

65. You used to (and probably still do) say "What you talkin' about Willis?"

66. You had big hair and you knew how to use it.

67. You're still singing shot through the heart in your head,aren't you!

A Few More Things To Ponder About...

1. If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide is that considered a hostage situation?

2. Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts.

3. Just think how much deeper the ocean would be if sponges didn't live there.

4. If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?

5. Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?

6. If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

7. I went for a walk last night, and my kids asked me how long I'd be gone. I said, "The whole time."

8. So what's the speed of dark?

9. War doesn't determine who's right, just who's left.

10. After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting OUT of the water?

11. Why don't they just make mouse-flavored cat food?

12. If all those psychics know the winning lottery numbers, why are they all still working?

13. I just got skylights put in my place. The people who live above me are furious.

14. Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?

15. Do they have reserved parking for non-handicapped people at the Special Olympics?

16. Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?

17. If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?

19. Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?

20. Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as "4's"?

21. Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?

22. How come abbreviated is such a long word?

23. If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?

24. Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery is weak?

25. Since Americans throw rice at weddings, do Asians throw hamburgers?

26. Why are they called buildings, when they're already finished? Shouldn't they be called builts?

27. Why are they called apartments, when they're all stuck together?

28. Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds fee" on money they already know you don't have?

29. If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?

30. If you got into a taxi and the driver started driving backward, would the taxi driver end up owing you money?

31. What would a chair look like if your knees bent the other way?

32. If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it, do the other trees make fun of it?

33. Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?

34. When two airplanes almost collide why do they call it a near miss? It sounds like a near hit to me!

35. Do fish get cramps after eating?

36. Why are there 5 syllables in the word "monosyllabic"?

37. Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?

38. Why do scientists call it research when looking for something new?

39. If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?

40. When I erase a word with a pencil, where does it go?

41. Why is it, when a door is open it's ajar, but when a jar is open, it's not a door?

42. Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars and he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint and he has to touch it.

43. How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a chair at him?

44. If "con" is the opposite of "pro," then what is the opposite of progress?

45. Why is it lemon juice contains mostly artificial ingredients, but dishwashing liquid contains real lemons?

46. Should you trust a stockbroker who's married to a travel agent?

47. Do married people live longer than single people, or does it just SEEM longer?

48. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?

49. Is boneless chicken considered to be an invertebrate?

50. Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

51. If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?

52. What do little birdies see when they get knocked unconscious?

I almost fell off my chair laughing with the cow video.  Excellent find,
Thaaaanks,
W

The cow is a winner!  :3-

 :97- :97- :97- :97-

Thanks Joey! LMAO and had a cow watching the cow!  :130-

IN 2007

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7vuh4kLHhsQ (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7vuh4kLHhsQ)

That song will be in my head all weekend. :114-

Another good one Joey.

Thanks,
Wayne

 :97- :97- :97-

you need the hole song then

 :3-  :3-  :3-  :3-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JYNR5FL0jJM (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JYNR5FL0jJM)

Try this Wayne, The Ventures Live: Wipe Out

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T8__EwAT8VM (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T8__EwAT8VM)

Been decades since I have heard that one.

yes Im bored  :72- :72-  Happy Halloween all

Boris Karloff sings Monster Mash on Shindig! Recreated!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nXLQAGJoz3k (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nXLQAGJoz3k)

The drummer is awesome.  You sure come up with some good ones.  :136-

Thanks,
Wayne

This one brings back memories (good) from my childhood.

W

go to youtube.com and look around we set up the site so all you have to do is drop in the link to the video

  and the site will post your video  :89- :89-


see image of youtube

Bobby Pickett did that one. In addition to a full length album of similar songs, he also did "Star Drek" which he self promoted at Star Trek convensions. I met him and got an autographed copy of Star Drek at a convension in 1976. He was a smart, easy going guy and I remember talking with him for an hour or more about all sorts of topics. Rest in peace Bobby.

Here's one from Dr. Demento I always got a kick out of.

This youtuber added some makeshift animation to the soundtrack since there is no video.
The skit is called "Tae Kwon Leap/Boot to the Head" and is by the Frantics.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NGPj_Uv7P84 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NGPj_Uv7P84)

OK, Bodyguard tryouts, have a laugh and enjoy! :97- :97- :97-

 Dan (tacman)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bauk0SGThW8 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bauk0SGThW8)

HAPPY HALLOWEEN PICTURE!

 :97-
CH :95-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1uwOL4rB-go (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1uwOL4rB-go)

Midwest NLG Halloween Skit.

 Dan (tacman)

http://sendables.jibjab.com/view/gQPtY3v7k2YsOh90 (http://sendables.jibjab.com/view/gQPtY3v7k2YsOh90)

And I can't forget my best buddy r273:

Dan (tacman)

http://sendables.jibjab.com/view/YplCial11RwNy7Tk (http://sendables.jibjab.com/view/YplCial11RwNy7Tk)

walter for president  :137- :137-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tlIzGRRorYU (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tlIzGRRorYU)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i_zCG-qLeRo (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i_zCG-qLeRo)

Jeff Dunham Achmed's "Jingle Bombs"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wskT6YfVB6E (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wskT6YfVB6E)

Jeff Dunham and Walter - A Spark Of Insanity

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LTCPgi9fwfU (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LTCPgi9fwfU)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3CzjCC9U3hg (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3CzjCC9U3hg)

I hope I made him sick.  :86- :86-

Good one, I'm going to sic the rabbit on you in a few weeks! :97- :97-

The Funniest Airplane Accident ever!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hwygbg0fKtQ (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hwygbg0fKtQ)

Joey,

I have seen that before..... Did you post it before on the old site????

Mark  :95-

Now if Wayne (a69mopar) were ever to take up School Bus Driving,
I rekkon it might go something like this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9N2eHWHuDQM (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9N2eHWHuDQM)

Nice one,
Wow, you've obviously seen me drive before.  My wife told me yesterday to stop "fishtailing" when I take off from a light (the roads were wet).

Thanks,
Wayne :61-

You know, I've driven a couple of cars that could carry the front wheels a few hundred feet, back in the day before they closed Fremont/Baylands, but I don't think I'd ever want to try it in a school bus.  :127-

A+ for effort to that driver! :3-

And Wayne, don't feel bad. My daughter gave me a ration for turning off the ASC on the BMW when we pulled out of the car wash yesterday...  :30- :30-

I'm not sure if we had it on the old site, but it was a very popular video on the net and was spread by word of email a few years ago.
The filmmakers still have an active site:
http://www.405themovie.com/Home.asp (http://www.405themovie.com/Home.asp)

Having a bad day ???  :96- this is having a bad day !!!

http://www.spike.com/video/deadly-crash/2782648 (http://www.spike.com/video/deadly-crash/2782648)

Capacitor explosion from excessive voltage

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_WheLp0RdLQ (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_WheLp0RdLQ)

Thanks for the post.  Imagine a really large cap..  I have seen some at work that are 4 inches around and about a foot long.


Thanks,
Wayne

It would probably take a months' electric bill to blow up one though...!

Somebody PLEASE tell me...HOW DO YOU PUT THE SMOKE BACK IN??? ???  :25- :30-

Glowing pencil lead
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=80DVT58j0xc (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=80DVT58j0xc)

Exploding pencil lead
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g9AgQJaNPWE (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g9AgQJaNPWE)

Pencil in microwave
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JT_r7yHTvXk (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JT_r7yHTvXk)

34 to 13kv Flash Incident  :5- :5- :5- :5-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lEAtWiUGeiA (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lEAtWiUGeiA)

Did you forget to put the obligitory message on a few of those "educational" posts:

Kids do not let your Parents do these stupid things at home!!!!

 :97- :97- :97- :97- :97-

CaptainHappy :95-

Capacitors can be deadly!  :25- :25- :25-

I had a prototype board that we got back from the assembly house many years ago that we were going to power on and test for the first time.

This was some time ago, and we were using newer surface mount capacitors in our advanced design Single Board Computer. This board had D case surface mount tantalum capcitors that are polarized. D case was the size which is about 8mm x 6mm x 5mm just guessing. When we powered on the board I was looking fairly close at it when all of the sudden there was an explosion complete with flames, smoke, and a projectile!!! I moved suddenly and then after we all calmed down I realized that there was a hole in the wall where the capacitor shot into the drywall. We looked at the tracectory, and realized that it missed my face by a couple inches!  :99- It was like a 22 hole. We all laughed it off, and then got pissed at the assembly house when we figured out they put the capacitor on backwards!!!  :30- + to - and - to +

See.......... Computers can be just as dangerous as putting a pencil in the microwave!!!  :30- :30- :30-

CaptainHappy
 :95-

You have to know that some of us will try the pencil lead light trick.

Thanks for the fun  and interesting posts.

W

 :97- :97- :97- :97- :97-    Joey, those are great clips! Who says geeks don't know how to have fun? 

Wayne, have fun with the pencil lead, just don't try the pencil in the microwave trick if you like your microwave oven. :96- :5- :72- :72-

CH, it's a good thing you weren't injured. Those capacitors can be nasty. I took some out to the firing range last week...  :107-

Whatever you do, do not open up a D cell battery and remove the carbon rod from it to perform any of the pencil lead experiments. You can imagine how I know this.  :138-

 :97- :72- :97- :72- :97- :72- :97-

CH :95-

OK, so HERE'S a Picture,
YOU COME UP WITH A CAPTION!    :131-   :97-

Ummmm.....ouch?

Dan #2

Q. What is the capital of Iceland?
A. About $3.50

Q. What's the difference between and an investment banker and a large Pizza?
A. A large Pizza can still feed a family of four.

Q. How do you define optimism?
A. A banker who irons five shirts on a Sunday.

Q. Why have estate agents stopped looking out of the window in the morning?
A. Because otherwise they'd have nothing to do in the afternoon.

Q. What do you call a hedge fund manager at the bottom of the ocean?
A. A good start.

Q. What do you say to a hedge fund manager who can't sell anything?
A. A Quarter-pounder with fries, please.

Q. What's the difference between an investment banker and a pigeon?
A. A pigeon is still capable of leaving a deposit on a new Ferrari.
-----------------------------------------------
YOU know its a credit crunch when:

The cash point asks if you can spare any change.

There's a buy-one-get-one-free offer - on banks!

The income tax authorities are offering a 10% discount for cash.

Your builder asks to be paid in Zimbabwean dollars instead of US dollars.

Victoria Beckham is pictured shopping in Primark.
-----------------------------------------------
The Bank returned a cheque to me this morning marked 'insufficient funds'.
Is it them or me?
------------------------------------------------
A lobbyist on his way home from the Senate is stuck in traffic. He asks a
Policeman: "What's the hold-up?" The policeman replies: "George W. is so depressed he's stopped his motorcade and is threatening to douse himself with petrol and set fire to himself. He says no-one believes he can get us through the credit crunch. So we've taken up a collection for him."
The lobbyist asks: "How much have you got so far?"
The officer replies: 'About 40 gallons, but a lot of people are still siphoning."
--------------------------------------------
The Credit crunch has helped me get back on my feet. My car's been repossessed!
-----------------------------------
As a surprise, a CEO's wife pops by his office . She catches him in an unorthodox position with his secretary sitting on his lap. Without hesitation he starts dictating: ".....and in conclusion, Gentlemen, credit crunch or no credit crunch, I cannot continue to operate this office with just one chair."
--------------------------------------
Overheard in a City bar: "This credit crunch is worse than a divorce. I've lost half my fortune and I've still got a wife."
--------------------------------------
An architect, a surgeon and an accountant were discussing the Creation. The surgeon says: "Look, we surgeons are most important. God's a surgeon because the first thing he did was to extract Eve from Adam's rib." The architect
says: "No, wait a minute, God is an architect. He made the world in seven days out of chaos." The economist smiles and says: " And who created the chaos?"
--------------------------------------
A man went to his bank and said: "I'd like to start a small business. How do I go about it?"
"Simple," said the bank manager. "Buy a big business and wait!"
-----------------------------------------
And finally:-

A Director decided to award an incentive prize of $50 to the employee who came up with the best idea to save the company money during the credit crunch. The winner was a young executive who suggested reducing the prize money to $10.

A couple comments here...

Jeff Dunham...  He's the funniest man on the planet, hands down...
I wanted to rent that "Jeff Dunham - Spark of Insanity" DVD from my local blockbuster video...  They didn't have it   :37-

Then - I was looking thru the listings in one of those red movie rental kiosks and - THERE IT WAS ! ! !  Can you guess which DVD was the first one I rented?
It was a deal too!  99 cents + tax for 24 hours.  $1.07 total for total hilarity - by the time the DVD was done I had to crawl to the bedroom to go to bed because I was too tired from laughing to walk.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That video with the high tension wires.  What the hell was up with that???  That shyte was scary...
(and why didn't the firemen turn off the mains in those houses when they saw the houses starting to SMOKE???)

Las Vegas Take Down -

"What happens in Vegas - stays in Vegas"?

I betcha he wishes this never happened ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TXXzvpnkvm0 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TXXzvpnkvm0)

OUCH!!!!

Should have listened!

At least he did not scream "Don't strangle me Bro!" (From the famous "Don't Taze me Bro!")

See the good part at around 2 minutes!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6bVa6jn4rpE (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6bVa6jn4rpE)

CH  :95-

 :97- :97- :97- :97- :97-

Could you send a couple of good-looking examples over to my house for my cats to check out?  :5- :96-

Redneck Rocket Launcher  :5- :5-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x-R7_Tt1wtc (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x-R7_Tt1wtc)

Stupid drivers
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X8be3i-nJZ4 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X8be3i-nJZ4)

Braniac Alkaline Metals
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3KnOrRZG4nU (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3KnOrRZG4nU)

Brainiac - Electric Fence
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tP-RgEJpN1M (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tP-RgEJpN1M)

This woman just never stops trying.   :72- :72-

Brainiac - PCB In Microwave ( Printed Circuit Board )
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L_JRD_zsqVU (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L_JRD_zsqVU)

Brainiac - Microwave - Alcohol
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7yhwA53rFk (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7yhwA53rFk)

Braniac Thermite  :5- :5- :5- :5- :5-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GyVD8V0016w (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GyVD8V0016w)

What a waste of alcohol.  I wonder how many people do try this at home.
Maybe I'm a "redneck" because I feel like trying it.  Perhaps a bottle of fuel additive instead. :118-


Thanks again,
Wayne

Speaking of alcohol,

THE ULTIMATE DRUNK PEOPLE COMPILATION VIDEO EVER
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tZmDWltBziM (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tZmDWltBziM)

Snowmobiling is big up here in Canada, pretty soon I'll be out..  W


Back Flips
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HdcLRu9MMyo (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HdcLRu9MMyo)

 :97- :97- :97-  You don't even need to understand the language to know what they are saying to her. The best part is at 40 seconds. She proves that if being stupid once is funny, then being stupid twice is Hilarious.



We used meek ol' sodium back in our day. Cover in a thin layer of vaseline and flush. Then wait for the  :18-.

Let's review, class:

Lithium      Li                yawn
Sodium     Na               hmmm    :100-
Potassium  K                stand back
Rubidium   Rb               OMG
Caesium    Cs               RUN FOR IT
Francium   Fr                NUKE   No, really. It's Radioactive (apparently frankiem and franseim are both correct)


Okay, technically, Rubidium is radioactive, too.

Summertime activities

Anyone could make their own waterslide
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uvN0PAdnwQU (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uvN0PAdnwQU)

Another Lego slot, wow.  Maybe someone could make a Wheel of Fortune out of Lego?

Lego RCX Minifig Slot Machine
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ExcWmUBHYy4 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ExcWmUBHYy4)

Huge slot machine
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4EI0kTJtN9E (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4EI0kTJtN9E)

Aren't snowmobiles Totally like,  -- exPENsive?  :96- :5- :30- :97- :97-

The last one I bought is a Polaris 800 touring (two seater). the list price was something like $12,995.00, but since it was leftover from the previous season, I got it for $10,500.00 with a cover and some mitts.  I have three currently, but only licence two since not as many family members ride anymore.  The trail permits are $230 each for the entire season, with that I can ride on any trail in Ontario.  Some trails are quite a workout, but I love it.  Maybe I'll post some pics later (in the other hobbies section).

Thanks,
Wayne

Well, I was actually referring to the practice of doing back flips with them.  :30-
Isn't that a bit like deliberately bashing telephone poles with your car's open door again and again while driving down the road?  (Don't laugh -- I actually knew someone who did this once while drunk!)

-------------

On the serious side, I haven't ridden a snowmobile in years, but I remember having a lot of fun riding them. Of course, I was young so someone else way paying for everything. :72-

They're built pretty tough, I clipped a tree one time (and lived to tell about it) and the parts to repair it cost me less than $300 (used).

Thanks,
Wayne

QUIZ:
Caesium (28.44°C or 83.19°F) and Mercury (-38.83°C or -37.89°F) are two metals that are liquid at or below body temperature (37°C or 98.6°F).
There is one more. Can you name it?

hints
Francium would be another (27°C or 81°F), but has so short a half-life that it cannot be maintained.
Rubidium (39.31°C or 102.76°F) is close, but no cigar
It isn't any element listed in this post.


First one to answer correctly wins a K+   :79-

Gallium.

 :3- :3- :3- :3- :136- Give that man a virtual cigar and some karma!

Melting point is: 29.76°C or 85.57°F

Gallium has one of the largest liquid ranges of any metal. It doesn't boil until 2204°C or 3999°F !! That makes it useful in high-temperature thermometers where mercury would boil. Mercury boils at only 356.73°C or 674.11°F.

One for Aviation Fans:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XRCbkBfdBrQ (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XRCbkBfdBrQ)

That guy needs to go play a Slot  :72- :72- one lucky sob

WOW!!! I had to rewind that to make sure I saw what I saw.  Incredible piloting skill. :131- :131- :3- :3-

That was totally skill  and knowing the limitations of your machine.
All I can say is WOW..
Does anyone know the origin of where and when this was shot?

Hell, after he cleans his britches,  :58- he should go play the lottery as well!!! :89-

Holy Crap!!!! :131- :131- :131- Good piloting under extreme pressure!!!

CH :95-

I was very impressed by the skill of such a pilot and I did a little checking.
The pilot was listed as James Andersson a pilot in the Red Bull races.
I checked the Red Bull web site and no pilot by that name exist.
It turns out to be an advertising stunt for the clothing maker  KillaThrill
http://www.killathrill.com/start.action (http://www.killathrill.com/start.action)

The same video production company that did this video has also produced this one.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CivSgzxFcdg (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CivSgzxFcdg)

I did see where this idea may have originated from. This guy was very skilled and calm when he lost the wing on his R/C airplane.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SsNIhBlyepc (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SsNIhBlyepc)

I still believe that the guy's that did these spoof video are very talented people and know how to create a buzz.  :3- :3- :3-

I agree. Even the most vigilant of us get taken in by urban myths once in a while. It had me fooled. :5-
Good job doing your homework Neonkiss. :131-  :3-

GREAT Job and Good Work Neonkiss for digging into this. :131- :3- :131-
I agree, spoof or not...this is still a tantalizing and amazing video. :89-
Some time back I had info & pics of an F-16 or F-15 (can't remember :25- CRS  :25-) that had lost a wing but actually made it back
to the aircraft carrier. Clearly, as seen in the RC video, this is a possibility. RC is subject to the same physics as full-scale. :89- Although
this would in deed take one hell of a pilot who is able to suppress emotion and react logically in a horrendous situation. The pilot in the
F-16 incident knew the plane was damaged but could not tell the extent....I think that helped significantly or else logic would have
dictated "eject, eject, eject".
James Andersson IS an actual pilot and you can find him in a Google search. He has as a website at http://www.jamesandersson.com/
While I agree this is a spoof, ( http://www.hoax-slayer.com/one-wing-plane-landing-video.shtml ), it IS one heck of a video. :89- :3-

K+ to you for shedding some light on this! :3- :3- :3-     (still cool as heck though)

During my digging through the web pages I did see the site for James Andersson. It was reported that this site was put up to back up the  myth. I was looking at his site and under the NEWS tab you see this statement.
"Jimmy’s aircraft shows an irregular throttle response during training, hence his initial decision against further participation in flight events and competitions.

A little later it turns out that this was the right decision: The fuel pump had been assembled incorrectly causing an irregular supply to the combustion chambers which could have led to engine failure in the upper G-force area during flight maneuvers.

As soon as the spare parts have arrived and Jimmy has fixed the aircraft, further news about Air Races will follow! "



 During my younger years, I worked for 12 years providing aircraft parts for an FAA approved repair station. Canceling a race because you can't find another fuel pump is total B.S.
When you have sponsors and mechanics that maintain your aircraft broken parts are only hours away. Parts like fuel pumps and magnetos would be items you would keep on hand.

I also found that video you were talking about, so I'll post it here.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJ76BSassms (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJ76BSassms)

THAT'S IT!!! :3- :3- :3-

Another K+ to you for diligence.   :89-   :131-

Why the printer won't work properly
http://s2.photobucket.com/albums/y20/PerthPurplePenguin/vids/?action=view&current=cvUMHvLZ.flv (http://s2.photobucket.com/albums/y20/PerthPurplePenguin/vids/?action=view&current=cvUMHvLZ.flv)

Jay,

Is that one of your cats?  :103- :103- :103- Did you send the video to Joey?  :72- :72- :72-

CH :95-

P.S. That Cat is smart..... I know this because I smack the crap out of printers when they don't work also!!!!!  :25- :97- :97- :97- :25-

This looks like troubleshooting the Dell computer way....... :30- :30- :30-

 :72- :72- :72- :72- :72- :72-
 :97-   :97-   :97-   :97-   :97-   :97-               ...especially the end  :96-

 :31-     :31-     :31-     :31-     :31-     :31-
 :30- :30- :30- :30- :30- :30-
 :110- :110- :110- :110- :110- :110-
 :111- :111- :111- :111- :111- :111-

I Canada sometimes we get freezing rain in the winter, and the radio stations can over dramatize things,

This is a callers response to that

By the way our temperatures are in Celsius so +2 is around 36 degrees Fahrenheit, witch is considered warm in the winter.

Wes

WATCH IT SHRED! ASTEROIDS
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uQs5hchKCAM (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uQs5hchKCAM)

arcade machine demolition
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mzWmuCbOXjY (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mzWmuCbOXjY)

Little Girl Hacks Claw Machine
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yKfkxVH6Ljc (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yKfkxVH6Ljc)

Hummer vs. Vending Machine
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xnyDGTGAqNA (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xnyDGTGAqNA)

Good one, Wes!  I laughed till I hurt on that one. Nothing like the media blowing stuff way out of proportion as per usual.

Karma for you for sharing.

I would have been freaking if it were my daughter.  Wow.  I wouldn't have believed it if I didn't see it.

Thanks,
Wayne

Way to teach moral values to your child. I also noticed that no one reported what was going on to the store, not even the employee. :81-

But it is funny to watch.  :96-
If she stayed in there a bit longer someone could always come along and win themselves a free daughter. Feed three times daily. :5- :30-

I would have just thrown in a dollar and pulled her butt out with the claw!!!! :5- :5- :5-

 Dan (tacman)

Barcrest - All Fired Up (Part 1)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dh-h_0jj9LY (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dh-h_0jj9LY)

Barcrest - All Fired Up (Part 2)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gct-2DHxiFg (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gct-2DHxiFg)

Barcrest - All Fired Up (Part 3)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wrYYf6njuE0 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wrYYf6njuE0)

a guy smashing a machine
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4rTDQZB4pfk (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4rTDQZB4pfk)

"A guy witnesses an accident":

http://www.chumfm.com/MorningShow/bits/march24.swf (http://www.chumfm.com/MorningShow/bits/march24.swf)

Some you you will remember this from last year on the old site. Now that we've got snow here in the Midwest, I guess it applies. Enjoy!

 Dan (tacman)

http://sendables.jibjab.com/view/owner/3eZOptZAwtP8RKt3y3x3ds4j#/recipient/3eZOptZAwtP8RKt3y3x3ds4j (http://sendables.jibjab.com/view/owner/3eZOptZAwtP8RKt3y3x3ds4j#/recipient/3eZOptZAwtP8RKt3y3x3ds4j)

For some reason the site won't let me embed this, Sorry, you'll have to use the link.

OH NO right in the nuuts again

        Ah, a CLASSIC! :109- :107-

Which Ron to root for? :128-  or should I root for Dan???  :103-  :97- :97- :97- :97-
I'm surprised it's still up. How long do they keep personalized videos on their site?

 :72-

John the Toilet Shot, Laid to Rest (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,486304,00.html#)     (from foxnews.com)

John the Toilet Shot, Laid to Rest

Saturday, January 31, 2009


CENTERVILLE, Utah —  John, a porcelain commode gunned down in an accidental shooting at a fast food restaurant's bathroom, has died. His age was not immediately known.

The toilet was shattered by a bullet Jan. 12 when a man's gun fell from its holster as he was pulling up his pants, police said. Police do not plan to file criminal charges in connection with the incident.

Christian Martinez, manager of the Carl's Jr. where John was gunned down, held a memorial service Friday at the restaurant. He gave away bottles of John's favorite toilet cleaner, Kaboom Bowl Blaster, to the eatery's first 50 patrons.

A Bountiful flower shop provided a large floral arrangement.

"In all my years, I can say without a doubt that I have never delivered for a toilet," said deliveryman Doug Graham, "but I thought it was the funniest thing I've ever heard. I got a kick out of it."

Remnants of John hit and cut the gun owner's arm, but he was not seriously injured.

Police blamed John's death on the gun and style of holster the man was using.

"He was survived by the men's urinal and wash sink," said Martinez. "He left us way too soon."

File that under "Only in Utah" (no offense to anyone from Utah).  :25- :25- :72- :72-

It gave me a good laugh. :72-

Thanks,
Wayne

I've been married going on 31 years, that's too many Valentines to have to endure!!!!  :81-

http://sendables.jibjab.com/view/UrZpRQWKvoTPIM36HW9F

Dan (tacman)

That's a good one!  I thought I saw a rabbit flying around too, did you see it?. :97-
Ron

New product from Sony

http://www.theonion.com/content/video/sony_releases_new_stupid_piece_of (http://www.theonion.com/content/video/sony_releases_new_stupid_piece_of)

Warning: Very explicit language

 :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- K+ :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- I've met up with several of this device's brothers over the years. But what the hell, we buy into these companies' sucker plays of making us consumers want and need the latest version of every freakin' gadget they pump out, so in the end we get what we deserve. :30- :30-

The bit is still hilarious.  :96- :3-
PS: Their bandwidth is a little slow. It wouldn't download as fast as necessary to watch it unimpeded.

Here is another Onion video for the new Apple Wheel computer. :96-

http://www.theonion.com/content/video/apple_introduces_revolutionary (http://www.theonion.com/content/video/apple_introduces_revolutionary)

Favorite Quote:
"Everything is just a few hundred clicks away"

"...let the Predictive Sentence Technology complete the sentence for you..." (I guess we pronounce that 'Pssst')
Check out the sentences! Very helpful, these. Some excerpts: :79-
{The Althusserian scholar gave his copy of Lacan's "Écrits" to the abortion doctor.}  <-- the joke writer certainly did his homework with this one!
{The amiable Althusserian scholar asked the aardvark for an absinthe.}    :147-
{The ass asked for a better absinthe.}     :155- <-- think late 1960's ;) (my joke)
{The awning covered the agile aardvark during the amiable rainstorm.}
{The babbling baby baked brownies with the amiable crocodile.}

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x5odhh_pop-corn-telephone-portable-microon_news (http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x5odhh_pop-corn-telephone-portable-microon_news)

Thanks, that was neat only now I'm craving popcorn.  I will have to try this to believe that they didn't mount a magnetron under the table.

W

That is exactly how they did it, put a magnatron and parts to run it under the table.

There is not enough RF energy out of a cell phone to get the popcorn hot enough to pop, wrong frequency, and these days 200mw output is the maximum RF output of a cell phone.

For those that don't know, a magnetron is the part in a microwave that creates the"micro waves".  This is the short answer, for the long answer go to http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-a-magnetron.htm (http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-a-magnetron.htm)

Thanks,
Wayne

Sorry to burst everyone's popcorn bubble, but the ad is all camera fakery. They simply dropped pieces of popped popcorn from above and did some post production editing. I'll try to find a video on "how they did it" if possible. :79-



<ADD>
Okay, Snopes has it:

http://www.snopes.com/science/cookegg.asp (http://www.snopes.com/science/cookegg.asp)

A microwave runs at the 2.4GHz frequency range - the same range as 802.11b/g wireless networks. The wavelengths are too long to pass through the little holes in the door which is a good thing because at 600 WATTS of power it would damage YOU if directly exposed.

Yes, 600 watts of power!

Current digital cell phones are 200mw max. The old analog car mount ones were 3 watts max which were bad enough, but at least their antennas weren't next to your head.

Hmmm.... .2 watts max. You'd need 3000 cell phones to equal the power of a microwave oven. Think about that then decide if it's real or not. ;)

I'd imagine turning on a microwave oven is pretty similiar to turning on 6  100 watt light bulbs?
My teenage boys usually have every bloody light on in the house when I get home after work.... :72-

My wife has that same problem!

lol....

Dan #2

Have them pay the electric bill for a few months from their allowance, or job money, if they work.  :166- :29-

The average microwave is rated at about 1100 watts. I just looked at mine, which has that consumer rating, and it actually consumes 13.5A - about 1485-1620 watts. The only other household devices that typically use that much power are heaters -- blow dryers, toasters, space heaters, etcetera. I think that channelmaniac was referring to the actual net power that is radiated inside the cooking area.

Yep. I was referring to the output of the magentron.

Have your kids pay for the electricity they use. Hell, my kid just handed me $8 towards his new crane machine. He wanted it so I told him he'd have to pay me back for it if we bought it. He's paying for the crane and the parts needed to make it whole. I did the labor for free.

(http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3511/3302991520_ec20bc9cfa.jpg)

I'm mean, I know, but my kid has to learn the value of a dollar somehow AND learn how credit works. ;)

RJ

I thought you might just make him put in quarters. That way you not only cover your costs but potentially create a profit.
You would also be teaching him about business as he could optionally bring his friends over to play.

This is how I grew up also, my parents were what I call "survivors", they would buy at auctions or yard/garage sales and sell at flea markets to make ends meet, I was there along side of them selling the toys and other things that I would buy.  Too many parents just give their children money these days, without understanding the work involved or the value of it, they aren't as well prepared for the world.  We all want to "spoil" our children at times, but not all the time.

Thanks,
Wayne

Do you think it is part female DNA to leave the lights on???   -  Actually I did a ton of stuff to make our house energy efficient.   Last year our energy usage went down by 40% -   NOW  ConEd (our energy company) raised the rates - REVENUE WAS DOWN BECAUSE PEOPLE WERE CONSERVING!!!!!!!!

Now I just don't care and leave all the lights on, the heat up to 78 and my slots on all day.   F**k them -  You try to save money and get slammed.

Sorry but this is the rant section right

Ranting and raving is O.K., personal attacks on members or their countries are out of bounds. 

Even if you didn't make your energy saving efforts, they likely would have hiked the rates.  Companies that have a monopoly on things that we need always like to jack up the profits.

W

I know they would have Wayne.    You hit the nail on the head .... profits and greed.   :37-

I say enough!  :81-

How are things up north?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Gdg67hZPds (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Gdg67hZPds)

The cottage was great, a lot of the snow melted away, but we got some fresh snow.  The trails were hard ice with about 5 to 10 more inches of groomed snow on top.  Some of the ditch trails had bare grass patches also.  I uploaded a short video that my wife took of me on my performance sled.  The deck has about 18" of snow on it.

Thanks,
Wayne

Looks so great!    I love the snow.   

When I was a young lad we'd go to Hume, NY (probably won't find it on many maps, too small) and ride snowmobiles. In the winter on the snow, in the summer on the grass!

Looks like fun Wayne. I haven't been on a snowmobile in years.

What's a reasonable price to get a crane similar to the one you pictured?

In working condition they were going from $100 to $250 each at the auction.

Check around you for arcade game auctions. One place is www.superauctions.com. They have auctions in different parts of the US.

RJ

That's pretty good.  My 6 year old loves the crane games, never wins anything, but it always cost me around $3 worth of play EVERYTIME we see one.  I'll have to look it up.  It will also give me a good place to put all his stuffed toys, this is going to be the argument for the wife.  Just think of all that re-claimed closet space!!!!

Sounds like you already have a basis for your argument point of view.

When Grandma goes to Court

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q_L1vLv84vs (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q_L1vLv84vs)

Sound advice. Click below to open.

I tried to watch it, but I was too drunk to understand it. :127-  :72- :72- :72-

 :72- She either talks too fast or I listen to slow  :96-

First take the advice and then listen again.

I wonder if I can get a prescription that would allow use at work?.....just Do not operate heavy equipment or machinery! :72-

Damn, I thought this was legit!  :25- :25- :25-

 Dan (tacman)

http://www.theonion.com/content/video/manufacturer_recalls_hollow_point (http://www.theonion.com/content/video/manufacturer_recalls_hollow_point)

Now that's funny!  :47- :72-

Duuuuude!......Now that sh :58- t is messed up!

"Police warn that the moderately violent killings could continue into the coming months."    :72-

"Inferno bullets"    :97-

Who are these Onion News Network people anyway?  :5-

http://www.fundinguniverse.com/company-histories/Onion-Inc-Company-History.html (http://www.fundinguniverse.com/company-histories/Onion-Inc-Company-History.html)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Onion (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Onion)

http://www.greatertalent.com/TheOnion (http://www.greatertalent.com/TheOnion)

Okay, look what I found when searching about The Onion:

It's a Wikipedia page on ... Wikipedia! :127-  :25- :30- :30-

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia)

Just when you thought you'd seen everything.  :126-

Anyone want to go and edit the page to change the "facts"? :25- :97- :97- :97-

^ In some parts of the world, the access to Wikipedia has (or had) been blocked.

I came across this, and although he has been gone for 30+ years, Bruce Lee was awesome. If this is for real, I am really impressed!!

 Dan (tacman)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SncapPrTusA (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SncapPrTusA)

Boy, I wouldn't have wanted to be a fly on the wall in his house..   Can you say SPLAT  :30-



Thanks,
Wayne

Yeah, and he'd do it with nunchucks and leave no mark on the wall. :131- :131-

Funny thing is when I was in preparatory school in the 70's, I had a full-sized poster of Bruce Lee on a door.
That guy was one cool looking dude...
Posters were neat to have in high school back then.
As well as material full colored tapestry hanging on the ceilings under the terrible exposed light bulbs...
Everything was all right until my senior year,
when the headmaster wanted them removed from the ceilings in fear of them being fire hazards.
we were living in hundred year old wooden dormitories....amazing none of them went up in flames.

That infamous poster of Farah got me through the 70's....... asian dudes didn't do it for me....  :72-
Bruce however was king of the tough guy circuit, always wanted to see him whomp Chuck Norris.
I much prefer Jackie Chan as an actor but I still think Bruce could take him.

I couldn't be the only one that had Playboy Playmate centerfolds posted?
Better than Farrah, IMHO.

 :72- :72- I wasn't allowed to put those up in my dorm.... :72-
Craps, they did weekly dormitory house inspections, if I recall....kids were getting busted for pipes & bongs back then :96-

For me it was Car pics.  I have always been an automotive enthusiast.  However there was that time when I was about 11 years old that me and my friend found a box of discarded skin mags, including some European ones, talk about a learning experience.  :96-

Thanks,
Wayne

I remember seeing a European one in the 70's - no one shaved anywhere......

Along those same lines I worked for a old Army Kernel and as I was just about to depart for Paris on busines.
He came up to me and said there was nothing better than Paris in Spring. The hem lines go up 2inches.... then he grufly said unfortunately they don't shave until June.....

I still have a hard time getting that Sports Illustrated cover of Julia Roberts at Wimbleton (France) out of my mind. She had her arm up waving to the crowd... I am not sure she notied at the time but she had about 3 pounds of hair hanging down from her arm pit. ...after that I became a Cameron Diaz fan.

Here's something off-the-wall and silly.  It's a long read, but it's worth it -- I found myself trying to contain my laughter at work.

Source: http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/chi/1018581833.html (http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/chi/1018581833.html)

---

Originally Posted: Mon, 2 Feb 22:34 CST

Dear Best Buy #305

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: 2009-02-02, 10:34PM CST


This Letter of Apology is not only for the staff at the Best Buy #305 in Schaumburg, Illinois, but also to the gentleman in the middle stall in the men’s restroom at about 5:17 CST on Saturday, January 31st. You had been in there for awhile, so this Letter of Apology is as much for you. Please let me expand…

I recently finished reading The Chris Farley Show (I strongly recommend this book for everyone) and have been wanting to buy SNL’s Best of Chris Farley. After my fiancee’s grandmother’s 90th birthday party in the northwest suburbs (very lovely gathering, by the way) Saturday late afternoon/early evening, I decide to stop by and buy it. Right away, I find the last one on the shelf as my fiancée is looking for other “bargains,” and I pass it to her when I realize my stomach is rumbling. I decide to take a trip to the men’s room in search of a better life for myself. That’s when complications began to arise.

As I walk towards the men’s room, a mother is telling her son “it’s okay, use the bathroom, I’ll be right here” or something like that. I remember being that age (about 7-9) and public bathrooms were not your friend. I walk in just behind the little boy and see him glance at the urinal for a brief second – and then he walks to the rear stall. DAMMIT!! The middle stall is taken, and I think pooping in a urinal on a Saturday afternoon is a felony in most states. I sigh, leave, and take a couple of more (fast) laps around all of the movies and Wii games.

I return to the restroom about four minutes and ten seconds later, and the rear stall is now open. PAYDIRT!!! The middle stall is still occupied by the same dude as before (I can tell by seeing the same shoes and pants on the floor underneath the door). I actually think to myself, “that sucks, poor guy.” After wiping the toilet seat, I sit down and take a refreshing and cleansing poo. Things are looking up in life again.

I go to flush the toilet and sneer at how ugly it looks in there. It’s bad. Really bad. It is actually too gross for me to follow-through on taking a picture of it and texting it to my friend Steve.

Anyway, here is where things went awry. Very. I flush the toilet. Bubble. Bubbling. Rumbling. Uh-oh. The water rises a little. Please go down. Please. The water rises a little more. Nervousness settles in. Quickly. Shit. Dammit. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Stop the water. Industrial toilet. It’s not an option. WTF. Shit. Please go down. Water still rising. Not going down. Really bad. 1” to go. Fuck Fuck Fuck. Please just stop. 1/2” left. Time to think of an exit strategy. Water overflows. Well, I guess you can call it water, but it doesn’t really look like water anymore. And, I just remember about the poor guy in the middle stall. Stay calm. And get out of there. Now.

“Watch your feet, dude, I’ll get somebody quick.” I said it as calm as I possibly could.

I almost immediately find a Best Buy employee: “I just wanted you to know that a toilet is overflowing in the men’s restroom, and you’re going to want to get somebody in there quick.”

I find my fiancée almost immediately. I walk very (very) fast towards her. “Can you get the movies? I’ll get the car.” She knows something is wrong. Very wrong. I guess I won’t argue with her buying Forgetting Sarah Marshall, then. I go to the car and circle around the parking lot for about eight minutes. I am hoping that the guy from the middle stall isn’t scouring the parking lot yet for the guy with brown hair in the black pullover and dark green vest. My fiancée walks out, she jumps in, and I speed away as fast as a 5 MPH speed limit in a parking lot permits.

So, please accept my apology, the guy in the middle stall, and also the fine employees at the Best Buy #305. I sincerely apologize for any heartache, headaches, and pain I may have caused you. And for ruining your weekend. Every time I watch Forgetting Sarah Marshall with my lovely soon-to-be wife, a special cloud of guilt will hang over my head for you.

Sincerely,

Anonymous.



Location: Schaumburg, Illinois
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 1018581833

good finds knagl.


Just a few links down from that post is this one:

Warning! Explicit content and obscene language.
Therefore, original content not copied.

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/chi/623387629.html (http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/chi/623387629.html)

Now THAT'S some FUNNY STUFF right there! :97-

Had to go and check out the Best of myself now I'm addicted  :97- :97- :97- Hope they keep it up to date.

Too bad its not in a blog and others can't comment - it would be hillarious to ask how much he wants for the pictures -

A little CHEESY  :20- but with almost 12 mm hits :

BILLY JOEL -- "We Didn't Start the Fire" (http://yeli.us/Flash/Fire.html)

Bo,, the White House Dog's first walk. And am I the only one who saw the irony of calling a black & white dog "BO" the iinitials of Barack Obama, who is also black & white??

 Dan (tacman)

Hee-Hee!!!  :97- :97- :97-

 Dan (tacman)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=znMGufJpK4U (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=znMGufJpK4U)

This is pretty funny.  :72- :97- :72- :97-

 :97- :97- :97-  :25- :25- :25- :25- I don't think that I've seen that maneuver in all of the years that I've watched TPIR, or in her case, TPIW.  :52-

http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=1031682269835 (http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=1031682269835)


Not for kids, but not too graphic....just darn funny!

 :97- :97- :97- :97-   K+ for that one!

I was going to post that on my FaceBook but didn't think it was a wise idea.  It's too funny and love the sound effects.
 :97- :97-

And this is why one should use a spotter.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UAsZ3PQoL5k (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UAsZ3PQoL5k)

 :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97-

Love how the dust begins to fill the frame.  Almost looks like it was setup to do that.  :72- :72- :72- :72-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qNJ02rxaNrs&feature=player_embedded (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qNJ02rxaNrs&feature=player_embedded)

Doesn't he do Achmed the dead terrorist as well....

He is amazing...

No Jay, that's Jeff Dunham. Terry Fader is the guy that sings songs with his puppets.

 Dan (tacman)

  That guy Terry was Outstanding!

Broken Copier

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lsVfvfUlIm4 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lsVfvfUlIm4)


 :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97-

Never tell a woman she's fat -- even if you're a machine.  :125- :30- :24- :24- :24- :30-

I've seen that clip before....short, sweet, and FUNNY as all get out! :97-

 :103-

If you don't want to download it...here it is..

Dan #2

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JfltA6cO414&feature=PlayList&p=14C01C1D2E3B883B&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=13 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JfltA6cO414&feature=PlayList&p=14C01C1D2E3B883B&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=13)

It's very cool to watch, but I would think that if the maneuver were done on purpose that the pilot would have been severely reprimanded upon landing.
Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong.

I would venture say that is CGI. There is no way in hell a carrier ship captain would not have grounded and busted that pilot for putting the ship at risk during the manuever. And to be honest I don't think many pilots would either, that gets might close to the deck. The cool lighting effects when the plane shoots away are also suspect.

 Dan (tacman)

I don't think it's real...there's been some fake videos out lately :103-

I'm sure if any pilot was to attempt that maneuver, safety practices and common sense would dictate he do so over open water, not the deck of the carrier.

Agreed, especially after watching it again. :89- :71-

Bogus!!!! With a capital "B" in my opinion!

Most pilots I know care to live, even if it is on the edge!  :72-

CH :95-

P.S. Still laughing about the copier size mismatch! HA HA

OK, I looked at this, and looked at it again and again.
In my mind I went from bogus,  to it could be real with the shadow affects and when the afterburner is applied. ( abit of the Oh Sh :58-T factor there)
However the biggest  clue as to this being a fake was staring at me the whole time.
Look in the lower right and left hand corners of the video. (some is covered up by the Youtube logo) You can see the graph bars that indicate the health and amount of weapons you have left in this VIDEO GAME !

Yup, I agree this is a fake. But damn good graphics  :131-

Excellent attention to detail.  I watched it quick then went back to work, thought wow looked neat but was fake for the same reasons as the rest, never thought of a video game.

Thanks,
Wayne

I am so glad that someone took the piss out off S. Palin, what do you expect from a F%£$  retard like some of her in breds. I have been a long life member of NLG but lately cannot be responsible for my outbursts.

Where is the next hero in USA, what the f**k is a HERO, you sad AMERICANOS are really into exploding such a simple story into a full blow news item.
Latest from FOX NEWS......................are you a Purple  Heart.........................what the   

The news "business" is into sensationalism, they want to keep everyone watching, just look at cnn.  Let's not blame the people.

Have a great weekend,
Wayne

It's times like this that I'm glad that I don't watch television.

   McCain and Palin were the lesser of 2 evils as it ALWAYS is in the presendital elections...The current "person" in office helped created the situation as it is now and has caused damage to our government and freedoms and enterprize that will take generations to repair...

  I have to assume you either are retired or somehow still hold a job from your position on this as I feel this country is now in it's greatest battle (from within) since the election...   (yea I know... it was the peoples choice...Enjoy Socialism)...I'm done ..no further comments....

My mother told me something when I was a kid....;)
"Don't believe everything you see on T.V".................. :96-

                                                                            
   

DUMB ASSES.........But FUNNY....lucky didn't get hurt!  (foul language alert)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kv3lc0DlQoI (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kv3lc0DlQoI)

talk about a kick in the ass, that must have been a low pressure air bag.  Stupid thing to do, and I wonder if their friend will have back problems later.

K+ and thanks for the video,
Wayne

One heck of a HORSE?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AMj2K2-K8wo (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AMj2K2-K8wo)

 :3- :3- :3- :3- :3- :3-

Good story of real life. Thanks for sharing.

Ron

good video, thanks for the post.

W

Just got this in an email. Pretty cool!

 Dan (tacman)

http://video.telegraph.co.uk/services/player/bcpid1137883380?bctid=17075685001 (http://video.telegraph.co.uk/services/player/bcpid1137883380?bctid=17075685001)

That's totally insane! I didn't think sheep could do such things!

very neat, but the way the filmed it almost looks enhanced.

Tha

The strange things people do with sheep.  :81-



Just saw the horse video too. Fantastic! Thanks for sharing!
I've had several Standardbred race horses over the years and two of them stand out. A horse named QT Ideal used to follow me right into the utility room of my house. I know he would have went right in the living room and watch tv if I would have let him. Very intelligent.
And the second is Master Crash. A stallion who was as sweet as they get. Extremely intelligent, he would let himself out of his stall and let his friends out too.
I had to padlock him in at night!

fantastic.. another 10 minutes and 54 seconds I'll never get back  :97-

Only 10+ minutes, is that really something to be proud of?  :97- :97- :97-

Sorry couldn't resist.... :96-

CaptainHappy :95-

All this talk about sheep and horses, and I had to scroll up to make sure I was on the right forum!  :96- :96- :96-

 :97- :97- :97- :97- :97-

I also noticed that this forum had mostly text, and only a few pictures and movie clips!!!  :182- :182- :182-

 :72- :72- :72- :72- :72-

Leave it me to cheapen a thread!  :89- :89- :89-

CaptainHappy :95-

I'm not sure if those sheep ballets are computer "enhanced" or not, but it's darned funny either way. I just had to save a copy for posterity. Those sheep need an agent and a contract or they're goinna' be fleeced. :47-  :30-

Statfreak,

Very Punny! :72- :72- :72-
 
CH :95-

Hey, ewe gnu that I'd tri-tip bull the wool over Uriahs. (Or was that Uriah'sHeep?) :100- :127- :125- :30- :30- :30-

NO........... WAS EWE!!! (First Smiley reference.)

Damn, I just noticed you used that already! :25-

CH :95-

Donut bistro ardent Stat -- Immanuel Kant help himself.  :58-   :147- :147- :9- :9- :171-

OK I hope I don't get kicked outta this forum for this but it was something I JUST HAD TO SHARE.  Don't worry, it's not nasty and there is no beav shot so it should be safe.  I say should.

Mobile Stripper pole on bicycle New York streets!!!

hahahah Brilliant!!

Poleriders!...Woman pole dancing on the back of a moving bicycle rickshaw pedicab in New York City.
Visit Poleriders.blogspot.com for more!

www . liveleak.com/view?i=a02_1250531965

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=a02_1250531965 (http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=a02_1250531965)

That would apply to off the pole silly stuff. :72-

 :81- :81- But wouldn't it be considered more on the pole silly stuff??   :72- :97- :72- :97-

I'll let you guys take public opinion poles and argue about what topic to post in -- I just want to know when she's taking her pole on the road!  :96- :30-
Why don't they have these road shows in Vegas?  :8- :8-  :97- :97- :97-
No, seriously: Why?! :37- :79-

Cool, husband testing bulletproof glass with his wife as a test subject in 1952!  :3- Anyone know where I can apply for a tester job for MY wife??  :72-

 Dan (tacman)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M7mr7CK7zEk (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M7mr7CK7zEk)

That's just classic I love it   :3- :3- :3-

 :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97-

Love,........ Trust,......... Or Stupidity ?

You can only pick one.  :97- :72-

You know it's all fun and games until someone loses an eye.. :127-  :96-  :118-

Dan, if she reads your post she might just use you as a test subject -- and forget to hand you the glass. :5-  :30- :99- :97- :97- :97-

  :189-    :190-

I saw those. Did you just add them?

Yeah, she almost lost her eye, but not from the bullet... The glass almost took out her eye from the shock of the bullet hit! He could have made a wood frame and still had her stand behind for the demo! Wait maybe he thought about that and decided not too, but was a lousy shot!!  :97-

CH :95-

Well, by having her hold it, she could easily move the glass to catch each bullet if she saw that it was coming in at the wrong angle. :5- Those antique weapons of the 1900's are SO last century!  :30- :72- :72-


Seriously, she almost lost some fingers as well: about 16 seconds into the video.

That video reminded me of those old black and white reels
of chubby women running down a hill flapping their wings in vain attempts to fly  :30-
I remember my mom laughing her head off when
somebody would jump off a bridge flapping their arms all the way into the water.  :25-

I had to add this one. :97-
When I first saw it, I didn't believe it. :81-

But,  :89- :89- :89-  One talented driver. First one I've seen do this.

Now hold my beer and watch.   :154-


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kudnnUh3p9Y (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kudnnUh3p9Y)

Dayum boy.........dat der was fuuun!  :5-
Let's do it again!  :3-

K+ for the video, now if only I had a monster truck....

Thanks,
Wayne

I didn't know there were blondes in Africa!!  :97-

 Dan (tacman)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWENTr18u9Q (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWENTr18u9Q)

That poor tree. :8-  :72- :72-

AWESOME, but I wonder how many trucks it took to perfect the trick!  :30-

CH :95-

Caught me off guard, and I am still laughing!!!  :25- :25- :25- :25-

CH :95-

Sound like anybody you know?......

After you just brought home another slot machine.  :72-

Are Women born this way?


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zRRkJ95RxIo (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zRRkJ95RxIo)

And not to be sexist but,

Are Men born this way?

I think so.  :30- :30-


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KjTXLgCz-SY (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KjTXLgCz-SY)

:97- :97- :97- :97-
Oh, Neonkiss, those are CLASSIC! lmao. K++

 :72- :72- :72- :72- :72- :72-

I am surprised that that little boy took the time to kiss her first!!! They keep learning younger and younger!  :25- :97- :97- :97-

CH :95-

HA HA HA HA HA!!  :97-

 Dan (tacman)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wUZuV0xce3A&feature=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wUZuV0xce3A&feature=related)

If Slot Machines were Like Computer Operating Systems:


DOS= A 1930's trade stimulator with one, and only one spinning reel powered by wind.

Windows 3.1 = A regular 3CM game with 3 reels that would act normal and then suddenly spin out of control and explode through the reel glass resulting in no win.

Windows NT = A regular 3CM game where there are no visible reel strips, hopper, or bell. Empty reels would just spin and you would have to imagine your payout and wins as you could not see or hear anything.

Windows XP= An S2000 that might play normal depending on age, temperature, and if the line voltage can stay within .0000001%. Otherwise, it would just simply shut off and good luck trying to start it again.

Linux=A Pachislo where the outcome is not certain and too may options for it to play as a consistent game. Then the hopper has dirrarea and won't stop shitting coins. Then it powers off and won't start again.

MVS/ JCL370 (Mainframe). You send your S2000 out for repair, ten years later it returns as a Jennings Sun Chief.

Given the 911 anniversary yesterday  and all that's going on lately:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vA8k4BdvPlc (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vA8k4BdvPlc)

Dragnet meets Obama! The dialog is dead on!!  :89-

 Dan (tacman)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m4r6YCUtxfs (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m4r6YCUtxfs)

This Ad Was Posted to Craig's List Personals:


 To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last. Date: 05-27-09, 1:43 A M EST.
 
I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on my girlfriend, threatening our lives and me.

You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings.

I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.
 
  First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment when I drew my pistol after you took my Jacket. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason.

My girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model 1911 .45 A CP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening.
 
 Obviously you agree that it is a very Intimidating weapon when pointed at your head wasn't it?
               
  I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from bare footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me.. [That   prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again].
 
  After I called your mother, or "Momma" as you ha d her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I Went and filled up my gas tank as well as four other people's in the gas station on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful!

I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go’s, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!]

I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb ... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car.
 
  Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone.
 Ma Bell just now shut down the line, although I only used the phone for a little over a day now, so what's going on with that?
 
Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target. The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.).

In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider the career path you've chosen to pur sue in life.
 
  Remember, next time you might not be so lucky.

 Have a good day!
 
  Thoughtfully yours,
  Alex
 
  P.S. Remember this motto.
     . An armed society makes for a more civil society!
 --
  "The future ain't what it used to be"
          Yogi Berra   :5- :5- :5-

^^^^  :72- :97- :72- :97- :72- :97- :72- :97- :72-

CH :95-

Here's a twist on a classic.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EnhZscDJFy8 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EnhZscDJFy8)

uussssssssssssssp. . . . [cough] . . Uh, I'd love to comment on that video, but I'm too stoned.  :14-  :149- 
:72-   :72-   :72-   :72-

Remember in CA, your medical marijuana is a game, not a crime. And you slot machine is not a game, it's a crime! :25- :25- :25-

Koala the inebriated Koala.............


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KqobhSoQSXM (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KqobhSoQSXM)

Enjoy a good laugh!

 Dan (tacman)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rN7pkFNEg5c (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rN7pkFNEg5c)

I like that one, Thanks and K+

OK.......................Who wants to chip in for a group buy? From craigslist, link at bottom.



1983 Key to Room #777, Central Tower, Caesars Palace, Las Vegas - $10000

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: 2009-12-06, 8:06PM PST


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


My first trip to Las Vegas (there have only been two), I stayed in Room # 777 in the Central Tower of Caesars Palace. I hit a progressive jackpot ($100.55) within my first ten spins on a slot machine. I saw Bernadette Peters do a bawdy number about masturbation I'll never forget. And the arrangements were made and paid by a business contact I never met, only spoke with. That trip, is one of my fondest memories.

I stole the key.

Life goes on and rarely measures up to the effervescent promise of youth. My life of late has played like the script for a bad movie. I can only visit Las Vegas in spirit, and I can not touch the magic, but I can toss this key onto the table of craigslist … I could use a kiss from Lady Luck.

In the past eighteen months:

My husband of nearly twenty years decided he didn't want to be married and left.
He hasn't filed for divorce and he knows I don't have the money for an attorney, because he took all the money (and his twenty something girlfriend).
He left all the bills, responsibilities and an unfinished bathroom remodel (90% demolished).
The IRS is after him because he hasn't filed taxes in three years (we file separately) and now they intend to lien my home because I foolishly added him onto the title when my parents died so they consider it an asset of his.
I've been “a homemaker” and in this economy those offering jobs are overwhelmed with applicants, employers are more inclined to hire the recently laid off than someone who has been out of the workforce for many years

I could go on but like I said, a bad movie and I don't want you walking out quite yet.

I would like to sell my Caesars Palace Key for $10K, it won't get me out of the hole I'm in but it will beat back the hounds from the door. A big winner, a generous person, a collector of memorabilia, all I need is one. The key is a little bent and shows wear and age, but it's not cracked or broken, not unlike me.

Payment via Paypal (you will be able to confirm my identity), shipment via priority mail.

Luck, help this Lady tonight …



http://lasvegas.craigslist.org/clt/1498357333.html (http://lasvegas.craigslist.org/clt/1498357333.html)

Yikes! 10k for a key to ANYTHING is awful steep!

Remind your husband the basics of math....... 18 goes into 54....... more times than 54 goes into 18....  :72-

The pics on the origional ad are good enough where I think we can make a working reproduction....

   sell them for mabey $1000 instead of $10000 ?   :97-

Oh, I dunno. How about a key to a safe with $1,000,000 cash inside that you could keep. Would that be worth $10,000? :5- :127- :30-

 :107-


  :131- :97- :97- :97-

Not sure if this one has ever been posted.  I absolutely LOVED it when I first heard, and it still makes me laugh.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J5z4Vs26-TI (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J5z4Vs26-TI)

I've heard it before, but was still good for another laugh.
 :97-
Thanks,
Wayne

:205-  It's a classic.  :131-  Thanks for posting it. :3-

I rec'd this via email. Can't attest to the dialogue of the email but the vids speak for themselves.  (Can Revenge be any more SWEET?)

from email:
A musician named Dave Carroll recently had difficulty with
United Airlines. United apparently damaged his treasured Taylor
guitar ($3500) during a flight. Dave spent over 9 months trying to
get United to pay for damages caused by baggage handlers to his
custom Taylor guitar. During his final exchange with the United
Customer Relations Manager, he stated that he was left with no
choice other than to create a music video for Youtube exposing
their lack of cooperation. The Manager responded : "Good luck with that one, pal".
So he posted a retaliatory video on Youtube. The
video has since received over 7 million hits. United Airlines
contacted the musician and attempted settlement in exchange for
pulling the video. Naturally his response was: "Good luck with that
one, pal". Taylor Guitars sent the musician 2 new custom guitars in
appreciation for the product recognition from the video that has
lead to a sharp increase in orders.

Here's the video ....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5YGc4zOqozo&NR=1 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5YGc4zOqozo&NR=1)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h-UoERHaSQg (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h-UoERHaSQg)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T_X-Qoh__mw (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T_X-Qoh__mw)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V0ophSWaRSQ (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V0ophSWaRSQ)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n12WFZq2__0 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n12WFZq2__0)

Bravo to Bob Taylor and the gang at Taylor Guitars!  :3- :89-

I was never wild about the look of the external BV on my IGT, but i found a new use for it!!!  :89- Instant toilet paper holder.  :97-
Now if my wife will only let me put it in the bathroom I'd be set.  :5-

oh that's nuts! lol
Hey! Is your Round Top cabinet yellow?
That would be awesome with a "Go Bananas!" kit! lol
That particular kit even has yellow background on the strips!

Sorry it's late here & i am board. :71- Yes it is a yellow cabinet. Would you believe it was a RWB when i first got it ,looked terrible. Go Bananas never saw that one before? sounds cool. :89-

Heck, it ain't anywhere as cool as that red convertible! lol
But here's a pic of "Go Bananas!"

Yeah the GTO is fun (can't wait for summer to drive it again).
That Go Bananas Is very cool never saw it before. does it have any special features?Not sure about the purple with the yellow cabinet though.

I think it respins like nuts like a "Haywire" game because it needs a Type 2 SP gamechip.
I've never seen one in action...
Maybe a purple cabinet then? lol

Yes, "Go Bananas" is a Haywire clone, so you'd still have the same game in your machine. :71- That round top in the bottom picture would be a perfect fit. :89- You wouldn't even need to change the chips, just the glass and strips.
And Jslots, that TP holder is over the top! I love it!  :208- :208-

I just had a heated discussion with my wife about this the other night!
I like the TP to come out over the top...she says it should come out from underneath...
now, is this worthy of a poll?  :96-
My argument was that it comes out from over the top because
that's how the hotel maids do it...plus they make a little V-fold!!!
( Oh Boy, I think I can see where this is going.... :97-)
I better get to bed....lol

Stout, for what it's worth, I read (somewhere in my past) that when toilet paper was invented and first promoted, it came with instructions to install it with the paper coming off of the top.

Off the top, so you don't have to fumble around underneath the roll where you can't see to find the end.

Gotta be over the top, and if you have guests coming, do the V-Fold to impress them!  :208- :208- :208-

My Dad used to run hotels and casinos, and he said that is the "proper" way to do it. Also I think that he mentioned that it saves a couple sheets every time... Guess that matters over the long run for hotels and casinos!  :79-

Heck what am I saying, my guests are impressed if I even make sure that they have TP available! :25- :97- :97- :97-

CH :95-

Cottonelle is running a real poll on TV and internet asking "How do you roll"? It is a real survey regarding how you place your toilet paper tissue.

That's not TP that's the ticket printer... :97- well at least that's what there usually good for when i go to the casino  :72-

Foxxslots had a special reel tray that had a
low shelf on the right for a DBV to sit on.
He also had the special DBV if I remember correctly.
I know they were called "Western Money" DBV's.
There was a short reel glass too with a metal edge and
the unit looked like it was made for those style of S+'s
that didn't have the hole in the door.
I'd give him a buzz and see if he still has the unit.

 :210-

You know, it's interesting that collectively we shun these external DBVs and call them ugly. They are certainly less elegant than having a machine designed from the ground up to house a bill validator, but from a historical standpoint (we are collectors of history to some extent), these were the very first bill validators ever to be seen on slot machines.

I have a very distinct memory of the first time that I ever saw one of these. It was in Reno at Circus Circus coming down the escalator -- the machine was directly ahead of me against the wall as I got to the bottom -- and I recall thinking about how much more money the casinos would rake in, and how much these things would change the face of casino gambling (not that I knew just how  things would change. :5-)

Ugly? Maybe. But their introduction led to the eventual elimination of change personnel walking the casino floors with carts. They eliminated the need to build banks of slot machines with elevated walking space between their backsides and to have people standing up there offering racks of tokens to the dollar slot players, thus freeing up floor space for more slots. They paved the way for coin-hungry multi-line, multi-coin video machines and increased slot revenue to the point that pit games were reduced to tiny areas in the center of the casinos. They significantly reduced the number of rolled coins and wrappers used, even before TITO, which of course, wouldn't have been possible without the introduction of validators.

These ugly external boxes started one of the biggest revolutions in slot history. I think that they deserve at least a small place in our collections and perhaps just a bit more respect.

SF :31-

End of  :210-

Just be glad they didnt hang the Ticket Printer on the side with the DBV...
The slot machine would look like a washing machine in a laundramat...


Kirk

David  I have one of those ugly B-------S in my garage if you will install it, I will bring it to you !! :208- :208-

I actually have kept the only one I have just for the fact that it was indeed...ugly....lol
But I also thought it was a very peculiar looking beast.
I also have one complete, and fully working "Western Money" reel glass bill acceptor
I will never part with because THAT'S also a weird thing too!
You open the door and the whole thing slides right out...it's kinda cool really!
It has separate boards in it and a huge M-th---u--er 60-100 pin+ gigantic cable harness I've only seen
on one of my dad's first dot matrix printers with folded paper and holes on each side of it!
The holes had to be lined up into the printer and when you were done,
you tore off the perforated hole strips from the sides.
I'm talking early eighties computers with a 4" green screen! lol IBM something or Tandy I think -
still in the original box in the garage.

Hello all!

Go Bananas! is one of my favorite kits.  It is the same as a Haywire.  Here's a pic of my kit in my S2000.  I don't have it in now or I would take some video of it.  Maybe I will have to put it in.  It plays just like this one except no nudge...

Dan #2

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mMLRKkHQDwI (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mMLRKkHQDwI)

Hmm...your game is "faster" than mine...I'm serious.
Mine's like a steam locomotive compared to your Maserati...
I wonder what's up with that?

I have a spare S2000 sitting here that I would like to make into something "nice"
Still looking for the Basechip number for DOUBLE 10X Pay. I dont know if it runs a 0001000 base chip and a SS or a SB chip.
I have all the glass and new reel strips for it. This is a 5 line theme


Kirk

Maybe you need a RAM CLEAR....... :97-
OH NO, Lets not start that S  :58- t again.

Dan 2,

In the casino's I've never heard that sound chip in a Haywire Deluxe. First time I heard that sound was while playing Titanic a few years back. Sounds nice!
The S2000 has such a nice chrisper play compared to the S+. Nice machine.

Although this is in the off the wall thread, this gentleman brings up many good points in this video and I was not aware of the scope the census questions would be taking. I thought it was just a head count with ages per residence.

 Dan (tacman)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RsDhkPym01k (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RsDhkPym01k)

:25- :25- :25- :25- :25- :25- :25- :25- :25- :25- :25- :25- :25- :25- :25- :25-
 :79- :79- :79- :79- :79- :79- :79- :79- :79- :79- :79- :79- :79- :79- :79- :79-
 :58- :58- :58- :58- :58- :58- :58- :58- :58- :58- :58- :58- :58- :58- :58- :58-

Be very, very quiet  :72- :72- :72-

Check this out...
Harmless fun, but some of the facial expressions are priceless :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDQo5rZhrWk&NR=1 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDQo5rZhrWk&NR=1) 

Actually, he has over 35 episodes of these candid sound effect runs in public. Done quite well, and very funny. Google Jack Vale or POOTER...

:)

Kirk

I received one of those extremely in-depth mid-decade questionnaires a year or two back. They stamped their feet and threatened all kinds of criminal penalties for not sending back the form. I ignored the form and the threats. (The threats both accompanied the form and were sent under separate cover, costing the government even more of my tax dollars.) They then sent another copy and said that I was costing the government money by forcing them to hire more individuals to follow up and make sure that I sent it in. I shredded the second copy as well. I haven't heard from them since.

If they want legitimate census information from me in 2010 (a decade year), that's fine. My answer to the only question that they are allowed to ask: "There is one person living here." Discussion over.

SF :31- ,

You had better not let the "CATS" hear you say that there is only one "PERSON" living there, they may jump up on their slot chairs next to you and develope a complex and ask questions!  :5- :5- :5-

I still think one is stuffed and not real!  :200- :200- :200-

 :208- :208- :208-

CH :95-

You have got me there. :89- :208- :208- I was playing my GM tonight and my cat kept getting up on his hind legs and putting his paws on my knee. He wanted to jump up but there was no room, so I pulled up another chair and he jumped into that one and sat next to me while "we" played poker. :31-

removed

I tried that too...
I agree - When a 10Mhz gameis installed on a 16MHz board, it sounds like sh....! :96-
Try putting a 16MHz chip in a 10MHz board...the reels spin sideways  :5-

removed

The 16Mhz boards do have a slight buzz that can be heard in quiet room, and the haywire re-spin sounds do not sound right.
100ns or faster game and reel chip will help with the buzz.
Maybe trying different 16Mhz Game (SP) for type 2, 21 that work in the 16Mhz boards may sound better.   
That could be a timing issue in the game chip or such (sounds like the sounds get jumbled or mixed up)

I have not tried a double spin or win til you win with them yet.

It's actually a lot of fun juggling around chips with different MHz boards.
It's even better when you have different board versions...specifically the board versions that
allow you to change the pins using the jumper next to the sockets.
I had to change the jumpers when trying out the oldest SP chips and Army chips.
I haven't tried faster chips other than those with about 90 or 100ns speeds.

OMG!!!    Is this friggin REAL???   LMFAO!!!!!!!!!    :208-


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zNZczIgVXjg (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zNZczIgVXjg)

 removed

slots are illegal in Guam also.......................

I spent 21 months over in Guam back in the early 70s and never fell off the island. :97-

Ron (r273)

I ran across this on FaceBook.  This guy is hilarious.

http://shitmydadsays.com/ (http://shitmydadsays.com/)

Here's a couple of the quotes.

"I didn't say you were ugly. I said your girlfriend is better looking than you, and standing next to her, you look ugly."

"Don't ask for my opinion then. I said congrats on the car, just saying nobody's panties are getting wet from a f*****g Honda Accord."

"War hero? No. I was a doc in Vietnam. My job was to say "This is what happens when you scr*w a hooker, kid. Put this cream on your pecker."

"A parent's only as good as their dumbest kid. If one wins a Nobel Prize but the other gets robbed by a hooker, you failed."

"I just want silence. Jesus, it doesn't mean I don't like you. It just means right now, I like silence more."

"Remember how you used to make fun of me for being bald?...No, I'm not gonna make a joke. I'll let your mirror do that."

"You know, sometimes it's nice having you around. But now ain't one of those times. Now gimmie the remote we're not watching this bullsh*t."

 :212- :212- :212- :208- :208- :208-

 :95-

Hey Ron, why are there no bunnies on Star Trek????  :208-

 Dan (tacman)

Sorry Dan, actually there are...

Episode Title: "SHORE LEAVE"
Production Number: 17
Original Air Date: 12-29-66
Stardates: 3025.3, 3025.8

Synopsis: After three months, the crew of the U.S.S. Enterprise is in need of a rest. Dr. McCoy and Lt. Sulu explore an uninhabited planet in the Omicron Delta region as a candidate for shore leave, but McCoy sees a white rabbit followed by a blond girl from "Alice in Wonderland," and Sulu finds an antique revolver.

Captain Kirk explores the planet, and encounters Finnegan, an upperclassman who picked on Kirk when he was at the Academy, and he meets Ruth, an old girlfriend. Other members of the landing party see animals and historical figures.

The landing party meets the Caretaker of the planet, which was designed as an amusement park for the Caretaker's advanced race, creating simulations of whatever someone is thinking. At the Caretaker's invitation, the Enterprise crew uses the amusement planet for its shore leave.

Spoilsport! Now you're off my Xmas card list. :97-

To make up for it, I will post the first in a series of "Bunny Suicides"

 Dan (tacman)

AWESOME...I LOVE IT !!!   :3-

 :208- :208- :208- :208-

Dan, now that's funny, I don't care who you are.   :61-

It's sad to see the results of all of that congressmen inbreeding. :5-  At least he mentioned Coral Reefs, so he's interested in saving rare slot machines. :200- :208- :208- :208-

I typed up a pithy comment to add to that video on Youtube, but the video has gone viral and I get an error every time that I try to add my comment. I have to wonder how all of those comments got up there? Did their posters actually spend an hour clicking on the "post" button over and over again?

:97- :97- :97- :97- :97-

Dan, did you create these, or did you find them somewhere? :79-
I've exceeded my K+ allotment for the day, so all you get is this post and a virtual tee shirt. :127-

2nd round of "Bunny Suicides"!  :5- Enjoy, I sure did, oh Ron?????? :200-

 Dan (tacman)

These under a website called Bunny Suicides, unfortunately not my creation.

Why are you picking on rabbits?

Its a Bunnyslots thing, oh a sympathizer, huh?   :96- The last bunny lover I dealt with.

 Dan (tacman)

Oh Tacman!!!

I prefer ferrets as pets anyways.

3rd round of "Bunny Suicides"

 Dan (tacman)

4th round...I can play this toooo  :96-

More bunney sucides,,,its spreading !!!

Hey Thor, I don't know if that's wise. You're getting involved in a "friendly" feud that has been going on for three years!  :58-
I hope you are well armed. :107- :143-   :109-


:31-

yea! The Bunnyman has big, big football linebacker friends that might want to say hello to ya.... :96-
For kicks, maybe punt you around the 50 yard line in a dark, unlit stadium... :5-

Hear is the EASTER BUNNY, well whats left of him...  :97- :97- :97-

Given that you've re-posted that one and "air bunny", I think you need new writers.  :186-    :5- :127-   :30- :30-
I charge very reasonable rates... :31-

These things are great!!!!! :97- :97-  Sorry I haven't had a chance to answer until now.  I'm not gonna go into it now but let's just say to pay attention to the ManCave Casino thread of mine. :89- :89-

Hey Stat, I was just playing moderator and trying to see what its like to move a topic into another thread where is is related to the subject.
However I don't seem to have the "POWER"   :72- :72- :72- :25- :30- :79-

Everyone go to my facebook wall (ron summerfelt)  :3- I have a card for Tacman Given to me by Karoake Mike

 :103- Is it your picture of all the poker chips? :103-  That's all I can see right now without being a friend. 

It is one of those Jib Jab Sendables  about a rabbit attacking a man but I can't get to play.

Ron (r273)

Rats I must have screwed up the link

 removed

More Tea Baggers Party  :79- :210-

removed

Yup, that's the poor sad sack that can't believe why everyone ridicules him, even though he knows stuff about slot machines.

He hasn't learned yet that losers like him will never get respect from others, because he has none for himself.

removed

Break out the tin foil hats! The gubbamint is at it again!


Give me a break... This is a moderated forum, not a free speech venue. If you don't like a post, flag it and the moderator team will deal with it as they see fit. Threatening internet lawsuits is a joke and you'll just be laughed at.

The moderator team does not "see all" when it comes to forum posts. We rely on the eyes and fingers of our members to report posts and to threaten lawsuits is pure lunacy.

 just relax.

I was going through some old pictures on my phone, and came across this one I took last year.

Anyone have any experience programming a Megabucks progressive?   :97-

(http://i46.tinypic.com/29by3o7.jpg)

 :72- :72- :72-

 :208- :208- :208-

That's really pathetic -- on a WAP progressive, yet!

I saw the same thing when I was with Wayne at Harrah's in Laughlin last year, only in their case, they were only using the sign to advertise the slots, not as a progressive. Not nearly as bad as your catch, but I still thought that it was unprofessional that they didn't bother to get rid of the C1 that constantly interrupted their advertisement. :5- :25-

Hopeless, hopeless, hopeless... :72-

No, It's not hopeless!  :71-

There's a blackjack pit with immediate seating to the rear!  :207- :200- :208- :208- :208-

 :208- :208- :208- :208-

Well I KNOW thats not at MY Casino... :97- :97- :97-  :30-

For what it's worth, all three of the Megabucks machines I saw in that casino were down (and the games disabled) -- I think that either their connection to the network was down, or that the whole megabucks network might have been down for a brief time.  Either way, I saw the "C1" alternating with the Megabucks attract graphics, and laughed out loud.

Maybe they're running their connections through LEVEL3   :25- :125- :30-  :208- :208- :208-

"We're sorry, but we cannot connect to your jackpot at this time. For technical assistance, bet 1 coin; for customer service, bet 2 coins..."  :126-

 :59- :59- :59- :59- :59- THE SLOT O HOLIC  :59- :59- :59- :59-

                      WEEKLY POST FROM DR. HOUSE

                     PAIN THAT ARRIVED FROM SLOTMACHINES USE !

Slotaholic pain is said to be caused from sitting too long at one slot machine. The slot-aholic is someone who sits all day in front of one machines, feeding the machine regardless of winning spins or naked pulls. The slot-aholic is roughly synonymous with the slots zombie.

Slot-aholic pains might be real, such as stiff back from sitting in one place too long.

Other pains might include a slotaholic elbow or sore fingers, from manipulating the slots buttons too long or too hard in one sitting.


Slot-Aholic pain might be more psychological or economic than physical in nature.

 For instance, if a player loses most of a bankroll, the player might experience slot-aholic pain of an emotional sort.

The player might be pained to know he or she is walking out of the casino without a whole lot of money.
Mostly, though, slot-a-holic pain happens when a player sits at one slot machine for too long.

 :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208-
THE CURE FOR THIS HORIBLE DISORDER !! GET OFF YOUR ASS SIT AT BAR DRINK HEAVY & JUST GET TENNIS ELBOW

your going to loose at the slots no matter what !!

 :59- :59- :59- :59- BEAR WARNING SIGN  :59- :59- :59- :59-

 :5-  :5- :5- :5- :5- :5- :5- :5- :5- :5- :5- :5-

TO FUNNY NOT TO SHARE

CLICK TO ENLARGE

Now that is some funny s%^t.  :200- :208- :208- :208-

BTW, can you say "Photoshop"? :127-

lol....Foh -Toe - Shop.... :96-

well I guess that proves ---- that a BEAR does S&$%T  -----in the woods

 :72- :72- :72- :72- :72- :72- :72- :72- :72- :72- :72- :72- :72- :72- :72- :72- :72- :72-

more to come later --ya ya I know you cant wait !!

morton salt --when it rains it pours --  I have solved the mystery of the saying dont blow smke up my @ass
wth actual medical proof !!  a tool was made for doctors -will post picture f tool >>ONLY << LOL

THIS STRANGE OLD TOOL HAS SURFACED AGAIN  :244- :244- :244- :244-

Many have wondered the expression --I am not blowing smoke up your @ass !! :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97- :97-


 :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208-
but in fact its where the >>>old saying came from <<

 A Strange Old  Tool. .  .Do you know what it is?  :103- :103- :103- :103-

think for a moment >>       :131-      <>>?????

Look below - this is NO  JOKE....

ITS A TOBACCO SMOKE ENEMA TOOL USED BY DOCTORS -- CIRCA 1750'S TO 1810

NOT USED BY CAR DEALERS OR SLOTMACHINE SALES FOLKS --OR LAND SELLERS

THIS IS GREAT ONLY IN AMERICA -- ORIGIN OF MAKER ?? San Francisco was mentioned near the BAY AREA !!! :72- :72- :72-



 :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208-
 
CLICK TO ENLARGE TO READ PRINT

Good laughs!!!
I am really happy now that I am an AAVID NON SMOKER!!!! :208- :208- :208-
Plus I do not stare at bear SCAT!!! :60- :60- :60-

CH :95-

 :103- :103- :103- :103- :103-

perhaps this is why all the people in the INDIANA JONES SERIES OF MOVIES

YOU SEE SMOKING A PIPE TYPE UNIT (CONNECTED TO LONG HOSE) THAT WAS ON A TABLE TOP

YOU NEVER SAW WHERE THE HOSE WENT TO ????? :97- :97- :97- :97- PERHAPS A

----- CAMEL OUTSDE THE TENT OR BUILDING JUST DOING >>>>METHANE <<<<< OUT---BURST ..
it said it calms the savage people dwn --or just gets them so wacked out of the mind

they just get burnt like the brain on the fry the egg commercial is like a brain on drugs  :25- :25- :25- :25- :25-

CAMEL DUNG --has powered many things in the past !!!taste like S%%%^T  LOL :81- :81- :81- :81- :81- :81-

  :81- :81- :81- :81- :81-       oops excuse me to the normal man or woman   :95- :95- :95- :95-

OMG!!!... I can't believe that sh-- !  :72- :97-
That's amazing!!

 :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208-

hey i would not blow smoke up your @ass bunker !! its there in color lol

So THATS where the phrase came from.

you know mst phrases do have a original source .. many I cant ask on the forum OR EXPLAIN IN DETAIL  lol
but a few are UNIVERSAL IN NATURE !!   

THE >>1<< FINGER SALUTE ---- in Rockets terms can be the same  as  HAVE A NICE DAY !

 the goose that laid  the golden egg ??? --that one has me baffled

you have to be SH*****TING ME  another unknown author

if someone wants to spend the time they will find the answer's
=================================================
now for CAPTAIN HAPPY  -THE SEA MAN !!  HE SHOULD RECOGNIZE THIS  ??

its from a book of famous KNOT TIGHING from sea ship knots to LAND BASED KNOTS & USES

I have the book to prove this term --    a >>>>ARSEHOLE <<<<< is the hole inside a wooden block
which we have most all seen on old ships or sailing ships --the term BLOCK AND TACKLE ETC

THE "ARSE" HOLE IS THE HOLE IN THE WOOD BLOCK THAT THE ROPE PASSES THROUGH !!

which over the yrs got called @sshole  .  if you ever got your finger caught inbetween the rope and hole while pulling something ?? it hurts like hell--if your finger des not get removed in process  ??

then --- came the term   you   ---f-----ing  arse hole ..get the picture ??

That's more information than I needed.  :97-

Ron --I think your jealous --you never knew about the wood block & hole or the smoke treatment !!
you have been thinking about that picture of the old  bellows huh ?? lolllllllllllllllllllll

I guess I should file this under: You learn something every day!??? :88-

CH :95-

Captain ,you did know that block hole answer from Navy training correct ? Man I'm just a hay farmer and I can tie a sheepshank + monkeys fist ! We put led balls inside the monkey fist made with 1/2" manilla rope to use as a Black Jack in our cars. Gov cars lol

Donnie   your getting old, does our memory diminish with age?  A Monkey Fist made with 1/2 rope would be bigger than a Basket Ball !!   :208- :208- :208-

nope size of softball after you soak it in water it shrinks up nice and tight  ..you leave a 3-feet lenth black tape the heck out of the end or splice a loop on it  you know the feeling of a hot bath getting all shrinked up at your age  ha ha just look at it ..lol

 :103- :99- BUZZ i did not say we need a bigger boat !!! along with the sheep shank lol

that happened up my way yesterday .. kids took the great white shark fin painted it black out of styrafoam and towed it through boston harbor
people were snapping pictures left and right until coast guard grabbed it and let news teams show the home made fin like in JAWS !!LOL

 :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208- :208-

NEVER GET BACKED INTO A CORNER !!

to funny not  to share !!!


 I can think of a few people I  know that live like this daily .. :72- :72- :72-
click on link below
enjoy lol


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LYhT6FHEpwY (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LYhT6FHEpwY)

Somebody needs to pull his head out of his...er...I guess the elephant's ass.  There isn't enough soap on the planet!!!  LOL!

Of this brings up the question - would you stick your head in there for a million bucks?  :96-

heck 25,000.00 twenty five thousand a head shot .. I would have a standing line to watch ..lol
did you think you looked any better when you arrived on your birthday ??

I would even go as low as 10k----- if i was guaranteed atleast 10 tickets per day tax free!!
its only a litte shat!!!

soap & water ..

Looks like he almost ASS-PHIXIATED LOL

Oh they are starting to pop up now ! What about the green house affect on ozone lair ? Lol as I said all zoo keepers don't get backed into a corner lol 

That is one crappy job!  Poor guy.  I can't imagine choking on rectum fumes.

Rectum Hell  -  Damn near killed him!    :208-

man...that poor worker got sucked in... :96-

I WILL MAKE THIS QUICK --THEN EXPLAIN A STORY I HAD WITH THIS BANK IN 2001
AFTER I HEAR EVERYONES OPINION OF THIS BANK .. ALL OPINIONS ARE WELCOME  !!

I think this is the biggest scam for a bank to do !!
not to mention for the business owners who pay there employees by check that dont do business
with the same bank as there employer -- to get shocked with this one --
if they go to the bank and cash there check -then get finger printed also--
so now that finger print goes on the check & back to whoever wrote check--what can they do with your finger print down the road ?? 

RE: The story goes like this --day before thanksgivng I go to local antique store with some items I was going to toss in dump.
antique dealer I  have known for years .. pays me $130.00 by check from antique store .He deals with CITIZENS BANK IN MA.
on my way home I decided to cash the check at this BANK across the st. from antique store .

 I had two forms of I.D. DRIVERS LIC. & DEBIT card from my bank .
 I said I would like to cash this check --also saying I do not have a account here .

Teller  said are you aware of the new bank rules ??-- I said no --please explain ??
SHE SAID  NON  CITIZEN BANK ACCOUNT people would be charged a $7.00 FEE
FOR PROCESSING A  CHECK OF 100.00 OR MORE ---PLUS BE FINGER PRINTED !!

I said to her let me get this correct ?? if i cash this check your going to take $7.00 bucks out of the $130.00 figure ?
her reply  was yes sir ..plus finger print my index finger on the check .
 unless you want to open up a account with us --or go to your own bank and deposit it .

The only reason I went to cash the check was I needed some cash for gasoline to fill my tank before the holiday.
plus my bank is ten miles away and  closed early that day .

I enclosed in this post two pictures of the reciept I was given ..razor blade is hiding my personal info thats all ..

PLEASE TELL ME YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT THIS .. I WILL THEN REPLY WITH A FANTASTIC STORY.
THAT IS RELATED  TO WHY I DONT HAVE A ACCOUNT WITH CITIZENS BANK .

Rocket


CLICK ON PHOTO TO ENLARGE.





 

Everyone who is given a check from this bank should demand an extra $7 from
the check writer. I guess $14 if they want to pay it by check.
I think I would just refuse to accept checks from this bank. I bet
that would make the bank reconsider.

People just DON'T have to tolerate this crapola from a bank.I caught hell from B of A (Bank of Illegal Aliens)....
Seemed they wanted to CHARGE ME for "Free Checking". I told them they needed to EARN my business.
She wasnt going to fold, I was going to pay a service charge or else! My answer..........
OK...FINE! I need to make a transaction.,..........
I want a Money Order made out to me, in the sum of the amount in said account ($10,000+)..She checked the account
and saw the funds were indeed in there. The tapdance and asskissing soon began.....
I got her boss involved, told her their business model sucked ass and please expedite said money order so I could go to Wells-Fargo
across the street. Supervisor said that wont be necessary,all fees would be waived and she was very sorry for the "Confusion" She asked if there was
anything else she could do for me........my answer.......
Get me the Money Order I requested and close the god damn account, to this day I wont have ANYTHING to do with Bank Of Assholes.....
Moral of the story, tell them to shove that $7.00 up their corporate ass and select the next bank, the best choice...the one that the check was drawn on...
Do not allow these chicken-shit businesses to victimize you. If you do, you have only yourself to blame....

Kirk

P.S.  a "Check" is a promissary note, you DO NOT have to accept one as payment!
When you get the runaround from stores like "Worst Buy" (Best Buy) they will pull this garbage.
Simply tell them at the refund counter you do not accept promissary notes, you want CASH.
I did this at a Best Buy, got the sheriff involved, i won and so did the people behind me in line that watched
me stick it to Best Buy..........


Kirk

 :72- :72- :72- I love it!! Way to go man! STICK it to 'em!!!  :89- :89- :89-

Simple fix: Don't accept the check.

Take it back to the merchant and tell him you want cash. When he asks why, tell him how badly HIS bank treated you, and ask him how he would feel if you wrote him a check and the tables were turned when he took it to your bank.

Anyone still banking at banks is just exposing themselves to abuse anyway, join a credit union. My checking account makes more interest than my friends' savings accounts at Wells and BofA, and my savings makes double their interest.

I dropped Wells Fargo when I froze (by court order), all of the joint accounts I had with my ex-wife. A week later, she emptied our daughter's trust account, And Wells said they were not to blame because the trust account was not specifically named in the order. None of the accounts were specified in the order, the exact wording was "all accounts where both (my name) and (her name) are signatories."  That was 16 years ago, I've been in a credit union since.

That's a pretty cool idea! No, really it is!  Would you lend me about 20k to start?  :96-

You don't need 20k to join a credit union.

Bravo Bravo Kirk   :3-   :131-   :244-  That is why I do all my banking with a Credit Union. Big name banks think they deserve big fees... They deserve nothing but this... :207- :18-

I know...that's why I'm asking you to  lend it to me...lol :72- :200-  just kidding ya!
I belong to a credit union...but I take out more than I earn    :5-

Ah, the American way...  :25- :96-

I had a friend that always wrote me a $100 cheque at Christmas for my kids.
I deposited the money into the bank at Melon Bank in PA (now Citizens) they told me that it would be 6 weeks to clear as It was a Canadian Cheque.
Not needing the money anytime soon as it was for the kids I said fine.
They failed to inform me that there was also a $40 fee for clearing foreign currency.
About 8 weeks later I went to the bank and asked them if my cheque had cleared.
They said it had cleared almost 3 weeks ago. With 65c dollars and the $40 fee that left me $15 out of the $100.

I argued with them that they never informed me of such an exporbant charge - and that you can dump an American cheque in a Canadian bank and there is NEVER any fee EVER for a deposit.

They finally agreed to reverse 1/2 the charge. I asked them to discharge my account / mortgage / etc and I walked it over to Dollar Bank.

Banks now make more on fees than any other segment of their business.

The only thing worse than banks are the payroll cheque cashing companys / payday loan people.

Thanks Jay ,
for your story of CITIZENS BANK !!

later after coffee time today --

I will post the rest of the story .. that happenned that day ..
that makes me  feel I got my 7.00 bucks worth of talking time in the bank ..

the tease below !!

since several patrons walked out of line and left the bank while I gave my speech !!   :97- :97- :97- :97- :97-
plus applause from one !!

Maybe banks should run casinos so that they can control the casino credit and the profit also, LOL

I know this has been ging around emails, but I thinks its hlariu enough to post here!  :89- Enjoy!!!  :97-

 Dan (tacman)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y6sNlO1eVFU (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y6sNlO1eVFU)

Why's it have to be this bloody cold???!?!??!  :37- :8-
I just took this picture when I went outside a few minutes ago...
I gotta move....lol  No wonder my cat loves her little box!

Ah, I see your problem: You need a new thermometer! :215-  :200- :30- :72- :72- :72-

I took this either 10 minutes after your did local time, or 50 minutes before -- depending on whether I look at the time stamp of the picture or the time stamp of your post. :5-

I'll be happy to send it to you if you'd like. It reads about 62°F warmer than yours.  :159- :287-  :97- :97-

Now I'm really creeped out that you have the
same thermometer as I do???!?!?  :97- :208-

Wait!  Yours is a "Springfield" while mine is a "Sunbeam"


I feel so much better now.... :200-


ADD>>> It's supposed to bottom out at -31 or -32F by morning...argh!!!
That's 64 degress BELOW freezing! lol

Well,
It's minus 24 degrees F  at 12AM EST and dropping even more.  Nuts!
-20 was at 9PM EST...that was "balmy"...lol

Mine's about 10 degrees over yours, and it's 9pm. :96-

We'll be pushing 70 next week... :89- :71- :79- :208- :208-

Little Trivia
Which is colder -40 degrees F or -40 degrees C?
 

Duh... the same.  :97- :97-

Strange  formula.  Its the only combo that is the same  . 

Mark, you live in the North County, this is normal for you  LOL

Brichter you are correct!

 :103- That's strange...Somebody's messing with my thermometer....lol
The engine barely cranked over this morning....argh!!!  :277-
Now I gotta go buy a new battery...craps :7-

I have 5 words for you: Block Heater and Battery Warmer.

lol...thanks channel...!
I'll look into it and see what they cost.

It was minus 7 here this morning.. Hell i couldn;t even crank over at that rate... :279- :89- :208- :200-

Heck, I can beat that. I have 3 words for you: Move to California*. :200- :30- :208- :208- :208- 
(*Okay, if that doesn't suit you, insert any state name you like that's closer to the equator.  :79-  :239- :240-)

Man,
Saw this on MSN news tonight...
Something fishy going on around here....!?!?!?!  :72-
Click on photo below to enlarge...>>>

:208- :208- :208-

Mr. B:  Look at that photograph. Dear lord, it's getting to the point where they'll let any odd, sordid riff-raff on the internet these days!  :99-

Mr. S:  That man in the right half of the photo on the left looks especially suspicious. Note the shifty glasses, the beard, the crooked smile... and he's drinking and gambling, as well! I heard that he was a spy for some company in the gaming industry: uh, GIT, Unlimited was it -- or was it that he was a git working for a group of gammy gaming spies? :128-  I don't know, but I'm sure it was something seedy.  :47-

Mr. B:  I say! In any event, we most certainly do not want to be associating with those sorts of people.

Mr. S:  Most assuredly not! By the way, have you seen where Muffy has gotten to?

Mr. B.  Off instructing the Senator on the finer points of bi-partisan gamesmanship, I suspect..   :79-

Mr. S:  Ah.

I would hate to see who that beared guy in the right of the picture was associating with!!!!!!!!!!!! :79- :79- :79-

Probably some bad characters!!! :200- :200- :200-

CH :95-

Iphone  :5-

more Iphone

(http://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc7/405312_332683040131108_268330443233035_912806_677192930_n.jpg)

NOBODY HAS POSTED HERE IN AWHILE .. I WAS GIVEN THIS POEM 35 YEARS AGO THEN MISPLACED IT ..
THEN THIS PAST FEW WEEKS FOUND IT .. SO BEFORE I MISPLACE IT AGAIN HERE IT IS !!

FOR DOGS LOVERS !!!LOL
=======================

ALL THE DOGS ONCE HELD A MEETING :
THEY CAME FROM NEAR AND FAR
SOME OF THEM BY BICYCLE
OTHERS CAME BY CAR
 
 
BEFORE EACH DOG COULD REGISTER
HIS NAME WITHIN A BOOK
HE HAD TO TAKE HIS ASSHOLE OFF
AND HANG IT ON A HOOK .
 
 
NOW HARDLY WERE THEY SEATED-
EACH MOTHER SON AND SIRE-
WHEN SOME LITTLE ORNERY YELLOW CUR
COMMENCED TO HOLLER FIRE !
 
 
AND AS THEY RUSHED OUT IN A MOB ,
THEY HAD NO TIME TO LOOK
SO EVERY DOG AT RANDOM
GRABBED A ASSHOLE OFF THE HOOK
 
THEY GOT THOSE ASSHOLES ALL MIXED UP ,
AND EVERY DOG WAS SORE
WHEN FORCED TO WEAR A ASSHOLE
HE'D NEVER SEEN BEFORE !
 
 
AND THATS THE REASON WHY A DOG
WILL LEAVE A NICE BIG BONE
TO GO AND SMELL AN ASSHOLE
HE HOPES WILL BE HIS OWN !
 
 

BY ROCKET LOL :244- :244- :244- :244- :244-